Never figured I'd be driving over to a girl's house so she could dump me

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Muad'Dib15

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So, she's moving to Tennesse in a year with one of her best friends. She could be moved by the end of the month or even in 2 weeks, but she's taking a year to get all of her friends used to the fact that she's going to be living in Tennesse next March. And apparently, had we stayed together for maybe 2 weeks more it would have kept her from leaving, again, for even longer as there's now another attachment point for her, whereas right now there is none as much as it hurts me to say it. With all of her issues and the fact that she really had a bad time in HS. In short, just all sorts of mental bs that most likely would have overwhelmed me after a while. It really sucks for me as I actually tried, harder than many things that I've tried at before to make this work. As my best friend said though, at least now that I've been in one relationship, I know I have the some of the qualities that women want. :D It told her, you know this is the part where I say if I knew we had a chance to try it again I'd try, but I can't. I won't. I think that's what hurt the most and drove the final nail in the coffin. I mean quite honestly, I don't think she'll want to go again as it'll just ruin all her plans, and I'm not exactly ready to go running up to her saying stop. It just really sucks and at this point I'm just numb. Yes, it was my first relationship and yes, it was only a month, but God, I've never hurt like this before, even after getting rejected in the past.
 
Time heals all wounds, especialy this kind. Go out in the garage and work on your car, have beer, have a cry, and move forward. What ever you do dont listen to the radio. When your heart broken seems like every sad song was written for you!
good luck
 
Learn to live by the 4 F's. If you don't know what that means, send me a PM.
 
Yes it's difficult but you should know that you're not the only guy this has happened to. I got married a little later in life... Well a lot later. I went with some wacky women and i was always happy to hear when one moved far away - with time you'll realize that she did you a favor by moving away.

Are you in Wisconsin? I always thought that state was full of hot blondes- you should be able to upgrade.
 
Sorry for your heartache. It will pass. She did you a big favor because now you are available when the right lady to comes along.
 
I don't know.
The "I'm going to move away in a year" seems kinda like something else is up.
I know, I know, so her friends can get used to the idea she said.

Maybe she's just trying to find out what people would think of it if she did.
 
So, she's moving to Tennesse in a year with one of her best friends. She could be moved by the end of the month or even in 2 weeks, but she's taking a year to get all of her friends used to the fact that she's going to be living in Tennesse next March. And apparently, had we stayed together for maybe 2 weeks more it would have kept her from leaving, again, for even longer as there's now another attachment point for her, whereas right now there is none as much as it hurts me to say it. With all of her issues and the fact that she really had a bad time in HS. In short, just all sorts of mental bs that most likely would have overwhelmed me after a while. It really sucks for me as I actually tried, harder than many things that I've tried at before to make this work. As my best friend said though, at least now that I've been in one relationship, I know I have the some of the qualities that women want. :D It told her, you know this is the part where I say if I knew we had a chance to try it again I'd try, but I can't. I won't. I think that's what hurt the most and drove the final nail in the coffin. I mean quite honestly, I don't think she'll want to go again as it'll just ruin all her plans, and I'm not exactly ready to go running up to her saying stop. It just really sucks and at this point I'm just numb. Yes, it was my first relationship and yes, it was only a month, but God, I've never hurt like this before, even after getting rejected in the past.

It may hurt now but if she has so much baggage you will be better off without her. You could stay with her and end up having children and then your life will be living hell. Count your blessings and move on. I wish someone would have given me this advise before I married my first wife because the hand writing was on the wall and I was too dumb to see it.
 
Your young have fun. I learned that even thought I only wanted one girl ever some times you got to push through the wrong ones. Not saying to be sluty lol going into everyone with the intent of finding your wife but always remember just because you love someone doesn't mean they are the right one you have to think how they treat you are you better both emotionally and as a person around them or is it just tolerable.
 
The moving away thing will def. help. At least then you don't have to worry about running into her around town. When I was home over christmas break I was talking to a girl. She hung out with one of my friends once and I got kicked to the curb. Going back to school helped me get over her real fast.
 
don't sweat it,when you find the right one she will be yourbest friend.
 
she will come back someday after she finds out how good of a man you really were, and she shouldn't have walked away.

you will just have to be strong enough to tell her "no" so she dont mess your head up sommore with the bs.

good luck bro, there are plenty of GREAT ones out there who will treat you right.
 
As our illustrious Ruler says: "Fo'ward". Once the hurting stops, you'll realize that you're still whole, and still a good guy. There will be others, and the right one will happen along when you least expect it.
 
I will share this it may make ya feel alittle better . I lost my 1st love to a car crash . We was broke up at the time . She still loved me and i her but we was better off friends(truned into a brother sister kind of thing ) . I would still talk to her alot when i got with my Gf i have now i called her and told her she was happy for me and said we should all get togather and what not that was the last thing i ever heard from her , Drove by her house no one was there called her cell no one picked up i thought she was mad at me for over a year intell i got hold of her mom and she told me she had passed away . Its better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all . Do i wish that i never got with her so it would not hurt . No i dont . It will pass in time man .
 
its a human thing that happens ....not just to boys or girls.....i have been rejected by boys before and it stings to be told your not good enough.......but as many others in this thread told you......your better off......im sure glad it didnt "work out" bcoz if it had i wouldnt be where i am now ......and life is a pretty good deal now.

time will heal. ......thats why we have cars.....cars may breakdown on us but at least they dont leave us.......they will still be there even after the tow bill comes in. :D
 
I'm with the crowd here..you're young and have plenty of time to find the right girl. This one didn't work out, and even though you're hurting right now, you'll come to realize that she wasn't the right girl for you, and you'll know that when the right one does come into your life!!

If you can see the emotional baggage she's holding, you're better off without her. Take the hurt and use it as a learning experience, and use it to guage your future candidates. You'll be surprised to find when the right girl comes along, you won't have to work so hard to keep her, and how right that'll feel!!

Good luck Bro, and many happy hours searching for Mrs. Right!! Geof
 
Make sure she shows up to TN walking funny. Then go out looking for the new Ms Right.
 
I stayed with my high school sweetheart for 11 damn years . Miserable the last 5 of them . I couldn't wait to die of dissappointment , but I was in it for the long haul . She finally left me and moved in with my " best friend " . That lasted less than a month . When she wanted to start over with me , I politely told her to %^$ off and die . Best thing that I ever did .
 
"I actually tried, harder than many things that I've tried at before to make this work"
If you had to try it was not right and these are your own words.

I would not call what just happened a rejection? from the sounds of it you had reservations about the relationship also. Don't focus on the fact that she did to you before you did to her. She ruffled your pride a little and it is ok to be humbled every now and then.
They are all learning experiences good or bad take the lessons and move on. Her hard life is something she needs to grow from. It is not your responsibility to heal that for her, you cannot even if you wanted to. Codependency.

I have had many bad and terrible relationships some really are still my friends
I am with a girl now where we both have the same interests and we do not argue have not in the 5 years we have been together. Most importantly she IS my best friend.
 
It's all been said. This too shall pass. We've all been there, and this won't be the last time you feel like this. Good luck.
 
Grab your balls off the shelf and find you a good women...tell her to get to Tennesse already. See you later. Woman don't want whiney *** men anyway.
Then learn sentence structure. Woman love guys that can write properly. That was really hard to read. :)
 
I'm with working on your car. Keep your mind occupied and hang out with your friends. As everyone else has said, it will pass. Usually the best time to find a new one is when you aren't even looking!!
 
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