mickey mouse and good ol jerry rigs

Ok guys my wife told me to start this to see if I really deserve my mickey mouse award I have been bugging her for. My crowning moment was after getting the rear brakes on our 00 yukon done in mass we started driving back to camp lejeune nc upon reaching the nj turn pike and its famous toll both wiggle strips the ukon began to vibrate badly and than the right rear wheel gave a loud clank and locked up in the toll booth. I proceeded to put it in 4 low and drag it to the shoulder where I found the caliper bolts missing and the caliper under the wheel. I removed the lugs and wheel disconected the brakeline and stopped the leaking fluid with zip ties a ziplock bag and a mtn dew bottle cut to fit over it all taped it closed with hose repair tape and secured it all to the frame with a tournequet. I than looked at the left side and realized the caliper bolts were also loose due to the gm service guys forgetting to use lock tite so I used my wifes hot pink nailpolish as thread locker. This setup lasted me the sixty miles it took to get it to another dealership where I could buy new calpier bolts to put it all back together the right way. So let's here em guys the wife wants to know if anybody has done one better.