S&W Bodyguard 380 Auto and 38 revolver

Recently sold 87 of my guns and have only 3 handguns left outside of a couple black power ones. I figured at my age and my pleasant attitude why would I need much firepower and with a change of clothing I can always be well healed with an outside holster and my Ruger Vaquero. For bedside manners the Browning A5 which is secured to the rails of the bed will do the trick as well as a friggin cannon and while I'm on the subject of cannons, I have two on my front lawn during summer months when religious fanatics freely come on the property, guess it has something to do with the weather. A few years back I was pinstriping at a dealership at night cause it was too hot in the daytime and a kid asked me for some spare change and I told him to leave me alone and if he needed money to get a job. He came back with several of his buddies and when push came to shove, out of my tool box came my military H&K VP70 23 shot 9mm and with that one said, we don't need any problems and I said, you are the problem. They left and I went back to work.

Well, I'm from a different time where partying was king and all these guns mean nothing any longer and I live where crime is rare and everyone packs, so I guess I'm safe from people as the only thing that bothers me on my property is bear and cougars