electrical is baffling me-help!!

14.6 is not that high. The PROBLEM is you were describing blowing out lights, which indicates that the voltage was a HELL of a lot higher than that AT SOME TIME. You may have or have had some short/ loose/ bad connection that allowed the alternator voltage to go way up.

Your description of other problems complicates the issue

You may have/ be "fixing" the problem without knowing it during your rebuild of the bulkhead connector.