Men & sex

What is the difference between a clitoris and a hotel bar?

Most men can find the bar in under four minutes....

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What do toilet seats, anniversaries, and a clitoris have in common?

Most men miss them all....

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How can you tell if a man is sexually excited?

He's breathing...

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What is a man's idea of foreplay?

Half an hour of begging....


Side note: My dog learned how to beg from watching me in the bedroom...

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What do men and floor tiles have in common?

If you lay them properly, you can walk all over them forever...

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Why do men come quickly?

So they can rush to the bar and tell their friends...

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What's the definition of the perfect male lover?

He makes love until 2 AM, then turns into chocolate...

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Why do most men prefer women with big tits and tight twats?

Because most men have big mouths and small d!cks....

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Why do men have holes in the end of their penises?

So they can get air to their brains...

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What is the difference between medium and rare?

Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare...

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LMAO @ going to the bar to tell their friends

Good ones today Karl ... thank you, from one of the ladies who enjoys your jokes regardless of who they're aimed at. :-D

CudaChick1968 said:

LMAO @ going to the bar to tell their friends

Good ones today Karl ... thank you, from one of the ladies who enjoys your jokes regardless of who they're aimed at. :-D

Click to expand...

You're welcome. At least I know somebody is appreciating them. You ladies put up with all of our "guy talk" without complaining, you deserve a few jokes for yourself. I'm glad that you like them.

I, like you, can laugh at jokes about myself or men as well as the women jokes. Everybody needs their turn to laugh. Besides, as much as they hate to admit it, men like it when a few (or more) women hang around.

After posting the last set, I thought that I should have saved them for mother's day. Oh well.

Anyhow, enjoy the jokes. They are for all the women of FABO out there that keep us guys motivated. The main reason we build nice looking fast cars is to impress you....

Also, Cudachick, DON'T DRINK AND READ THE JOKES! I don't want you to ruin your monitor with another "spit take"...

Why do men snore when they sleep on their backs?

Because their balls cover up their asshole and cause vapor-lock!

great lots of funny

Kind of a different take on the first joke, but here goes:

What's the difference between a golf ball and a g-spot?

A guy will spend three hours looking for a golf ball.

LOL to all !

40 years of marriage..

A married couple in their early 60s was celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.




Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table. She said, For being such an exemplary married couple and for being loving to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish.




The wife answered, Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband.




The fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! - two tickets for the Queen Mary II appeared in her hands.

The husband thought for a moment: Well, this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this will never come again. I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me.


The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish.
So the fairy waved her magic wand and poof - the husband became 92 years old.

The moral of this story:


Men who are ungrateful bastards should remember fairies are female!

Perfect. My wake up chuckle for the day. Now, it's coffee time.