I just can't

I've been married 39 years - she says if we could only bottle it and sell it or burn it in the furnace, WE'D BE RICH!!!! And yes, she makes bean soup, spicy pasta sauce and such - then complains when I'm always stepping on ducks!!! My kids bought me a keychain that says -"I wish my car retained as much gas as I DO!!!" They also got me a T-shirt that says "Worlds largest single source of natural gas!" At least they see some humor in it, but then again, my 32 year old daughter who weighs about 110 pounds soaking wet can clear a room with the best of them - she says it' a natural bodily function!!!! My wife holds them in all day long and then kills me after she goes to sleep!!!!!