A question that I am not sure how to even ask...

Okay, this sounds crazy, and I have no doubt in reading this you'll initially roll your eyes, but I have a puzzler that defies every bit of experience that I have had with a car.

I just bought a 1962 Dodge Lancer A body. I decided to change the oil for the first time. I followed the standard process; removing the plug, dumping the old oil, oiling and swapping the oil filter, and then dropping 5 quarts [4+1 for the filter] into the oil fill at the front top of the 170 Six slant.

Easy, right?

After a while I started the engine up and got the oil light. I checked the dip stick; dry.

Now I had opened a new 5.25 container of oil, but I dropped a half quart more in to find nothing on the stick. I then opened the oils plug and only a little came out. I checked the oil filter; dry!

I called my father who advised I dump another couple of quarts, [not turn it on of course] and see if it was somehow draining out without my notice. No dice.

So here I am with 7 quarts of oil in the engine, nothing in the oil pan, none flushed into the filter for the short time that I had the engine on, and nothing spilling onto the paper I lay below it to discover where the leak was [I was pretty desperate for any answer at that point; seven quarts would have rivaled exxon's last spill].

Because of the baffle I cant see down into the case, nor run a straw or small hose to see if [somehow] it had gotten stuck in the valve cover case.

I am stumped. Is it possible that the oil somehow isn't draining into the oil pan from the head?

If so, beside pulling the valve cover off and risking a deluge over the sides of my old block, is there any wisdom out there for a situation that I frankly do not understand, but has clearly happened?

Let me clarify; 7 quarts total-
no oil on the stick-
none spilling from the oil pan-
none made its way into the oil filter-
no spillage, leaks stains, or anything that fits in with my experience of physical laws of science and nature.

Is it possible that this old neglected engine sludged up that much?

Anyway to test?

Pretty confused...