Today I Have a Teenager

You said a mouthful right there.

We had two teenage girls, so I advise that you stock up on restraint also.
They loved to fight with each other, and one day I heard them screaming at each other in the dining room so I went to see what was going on.
They were having like a knife fight with plastic forks, and both of them had broken off fork pieces stuck in thier arms and faces.