I need help in the worst way!

I plan on it. I have been reaching out to other people who witnessed their friends death on a motorcycle and that's been helping. I also have some friends who have PTSD from their time in the service that I have been talking too. It helps a lot to talk to the right person but unfortunately I can't get help from my family members that want to help the most. I feel guilty not talking to my parents about it but neither of them have been through anything like this. The major thing that is bothering me right now is my loss of sleep. Just not being able to close my eyes. But as I said before, I'm not hurt over him not being with us anymore. He was having a very tough time in his life and I know he was not thinking about the bad things when he was on his bike. He was enjoying the last few minutes he had.

My struggle with the things I saw will not be easy but I feel no anger toward him or god anymore.