I thought I was a racist.

That's how I see it. That word has nothing to do with color, but how you act.

That's about it, and I think if it's big no no to use the word then they shouldn't call others that either.
But there we go with the realism again. (It's ok for some to use it but not others and I noticed it)

That's like saying Italians can call each other Spic's but it's racist if anyone else calls em that.

If you don't like a word so much that you want it to be socially unaceptable to use it, then don't use it yourself.
(Double standards) and I think it's BS.
And offensive is not a defense if you use the word yourself.

Some groups and races say they want equality then I can call them what thier freinds and neighbors do.
We can also dump the Black Caucus, the American Negro College Fund, and a few others as Whites, Mexicans, Italians, Russians or whatever don't have a Caucus in the House or a special college fund specifically for that racial group.

I MUST be racist because I noticed the bias throughout our society don't think it's fair or equal. right?

NOT! I'm a realist.
I see it, I know how it is no matter how much others may try to tell me different.
The fact that it goes unchanged is an insult to me and my race, and I think it actually causes some amount of racism.
It does with me anyway.