Married guys - car budgets and honesty

my love of car cost me my 1st and only marriage,kept secrets about costs,ordered parts and sent them to my friends houses,snuck them into the garage in the middle of the night.All things I'm not proud of.But she knew I was into cars when she married me.All bills were paid,put a roof over her and her kids heads as well as my son's head,all kids were treated the same.She would get pissed if I was out in the garage,tried to explain to her at least you know where I am,not sitting ina bar ,if you need me just have to yell out back.Put it this way my money was her money,her money was her money and I didn't have any money.LOL She inherited 100,000 when her dad died,told me I hope you don't have any plans for my money.Then within 6 months she bailed outwith her $and about 40,000 of my $,plus 1500 in spousal and child support per month.Needless to say I'm done w/women,been happily divorced 10yrs now and plan to stay that way.