I only get frustrated when people don't read carefully, and follow thru on looking up diagrams on the internet for guidance.
Yes, 85 to NSS
86 to a terminal of "starter switch"
+12 V to other terminal of "starter switch"
There probably is no terminal marked "+" on the starter switch, but if there is, use it for 12 V.
No. Do not connect the starter switch to gnd. I clearly said that. It is now only on the high side.
Yes. 87 goes to the starter solenoid.
Before connecting it, attach a multimeter from 87 (red probe) to gnd (blk probe) and see if it gets 12 V when you press "start". Of course, must be in P or N and must have ignition switch on.
Theory. When you get 12 V across the relay's coil (85 to 86), you should hear it click and get 12 V thru (from 30 to 87).