car runs 14.5V when it starts???

Your car charging system be putting out between 13.8 to 14.3 volts at FAST IDLE when warmed up. It will put out a couple of tenths more voltage when cold but should not be as high as you have measured at low idle. Try speeding up the idle by hand and watching the voltage at the battery, and see if it rises; if so, that could be one possible explanation for the blown headlights. The ammeter pegging is another good sign of overcharging.

The most likely problem is that the regulator is not seeing the system voltage. When it sees low voltage, it will cause the alternator to increase output to try to compensate.

Check the voltage on the blue wire going the back of the alternator (which also connects to the alternator) while running; it should be only a few tenths lower than the voltage at the battery. If the voltage on the blue wire to the alternator and especially where it connects to the regulator is low, then you have some bad connections or corrosion in the wiring from the ignition switch to the regulator. That is a common casue of this issue.

Then check the voltage on the green wire to the back of the alternator while running; it should be a few volts below the voltage at the battery. If this green wire voltage is low or near 0, then the regulator is likely broken or there is a short on that wire or in the regulator.

Let us know what you measure at the 2 points above. And check the regulator ground as above.