You: - enjoys long walks on the beach, quiet times by the fireplace, classic movies, cuddling...
WHAT?!?
Cuddling is out; My wife used to take my hand and put it up near her face when we were a-spooned;you know where my arm was, right. Well my arm is too short these days, and I can't get close enough anymore. It's like there is a little kid between us.Ima thinking one of us should lose a bit of weight,but I like being 30/40 pounds overweight.lol. Well I used to. Now as I get a lil older Ima thinkin, it might be time to shed a lil excess.
TV is out too; I quit cold-turkey last spring. Nothing but mindless drivel,reruns, and indoctrination on the channels I get. No really.
The fireplace sounds like a good idea, but no got.
The nearest beach is about 2 or 3 or 4 hours away for a nice one.
My life so sux!lol.
Lemme recount my blessings; No sex, No money, No power, No friends, No decent TP. Ima gaining weight. My brow ridges are becoming prominent,as are my nose and ear lobes. The places I used to have hair, I don't and the places I didn't used to,I now do.The things I aught to do, I do not do; and the things I aught not to do, those I do.
My life so sux!lol
There's more; The kids never come home and when they do they leave too soon.My doctor has nothing to say. My dentist can't save my teeth anymore. The chiropractor says he cannot make me feel any better. My deodorant quit working, and my dear wife keeps pouring on the "perfume". My mouthwash quit working,too. My tummy complains about certain foods.I can only walk a mile or two before my feet hurt. Time is rushing by and I still have so much to do,if only I felt like doing it.
And more;
My mom died in 94, my Dad in 2010, a brother in 07,IIRC. I have only 2 aunts and 2 uncles left out of 19. And a couple of great-uncles. People are dying all around me, My number is coming up. The Cuda is languishing in the carport, my storehouse treasures are returning to their native state. The really nice workshop I built gets used for oilchanges and mower tune-ups. My brother utters unintelligible demon shxx. One sister is a hypochondriac,perpetually self-diagnosing herself with every imaginable infirmity.The other sister is sane but we rarely get together anymore. Her husband is an avid fisherman,former hunter, and all-round great dad, but arthritis got its hooks in him;so sad, I like him a lot. What else? Oh yeah my dad was an athiest, or at least agnostic. My son nearly died laughing when I told him I was a flat-earther. My wife is not a believer and at times,almost scoffs at me. My one daughter politely bows her head at the supper-table when I ask for blessings from the God of Abraham,Isaac, and now,me, too. The other is flagrant in her unbelief.
So I guess after judgement day, I will be all alone. Oh wait my Mum was so pleased to see me get baptized. Then she died 4 months later. I think she was a believer. I guess I might see her there.Ima gonna get me some new friends in the New Kingdom;seems appropriate.
I guess my life don't sux as bad as I first thought;New Kingdom, New life, New body, New friends, New mummy. Hey, maybe I'll see some of you there. The password is "Yeshua loves you."
