Exhaust cutouts

I want a pair that open up with the secondaries and as fast as the secondaries open and then slam shut just as fast too. Yeah that's what I want.
Then I can run one tiny tube all the way to the tiny muffler under the back seat, and dump it right there. I don't care what that tiny muffler sounds like. I like the thought of forever getting rid of the the 140 pounds of dual full length fancy-schmancy mandrel bent TTI parasitic make-the-man happy, system. And when I mash the gas, you guessed it everybody gets the heck outta the way, cuz AJs comin' thru.
Ok well sumpin lak dat.