Sounds like may be converter drainback. Start it in neutral and see how soon you get gears. I have 2 96 Dakotas both v6 auto's. One has converter drainback and the other one doesn't. First Mopar I have ever owned that had that issue. Just a guess.
Drainback? should i flush out the convertor as well? thats the thing it gets no gears no jump no movement at all but i see and hear it changing gears at the valve body this is weird