engine dying due to electric fan

You need to get busy with a voltmeter. That is the only thing that will answer these questions. Some key points to check with motor running, and a jumper wire so you can jumper the fan stat on and off for tests:

"What is voltage" with / and without fan running, with engine running "fast idle"

...........at starter relay stud

...........at bulkhead connector the "big black" socket (ammeter/ alternator}
...........at bulkhead connector the "big red" socket.(fuse link/ red to starter relay)
...........at alternator output stud
...........at the "key" side of the ballast resistor, or where that would be if not used, AKA the dark blue feed coming out of the bulkhead connector

Crackedback on here knows what he's doing as well
thanks 67dart273, have been out there checking what I can, as I am not good with electrical.....but learning. I'll have to get back out there and do what you mention. here's the numbers I came up with, but did not have a 'fast' idle (although I did have to idle the engine up to keep it running while testing). so, here they are:
battery- 12.55 volts, 649 cca
alternator- 14.75, 13.9 when fan kicked on
coil- 6.7, and roughly stayed the same while running and with fan running.
I did check the relay for the fan, that checks out. the fan seems to work properly, cycles.
thanks to all that are helping, I do so much appreciate you all.