PayPal rules

Just adding my 2 cents about this:
I did not have a paypal account until a couple weeks ago. I agreed to sell a part to a guy and when we started discussing the "how" on the payment part of it, I gave him my email address and phone number. I was expecting him to contact me to discuss the how to get paid as I didn't have paypal and have not shipped parts before. I just sold a few things local - cash sales. He sent me money through paypal using my email address. I knew he did this (even thou I didn't have an acct) because I got an email from paypal saying I had money waiting there for me, even before the guy said he had sent it. It was a friends n family payment. I was able to set up the account and transfer the money into my personal account very easily. The transaction has gone well, money received and his satisfactory part received also. Then a couple days later I agreed to sell something else to another person. We used paypal also, but he did the "purchase" option(not sure the correct terminology). I could not deposit the money until he "lied" and clicked the button that said he received item, or I had to wait 21 days. No way I could wait 21 days to send the part(and 21 days still did not guarantee payment). I could not send the part until I had received payment for part AND shipping costs. I refunded the money and said I won't use paypal. He said wait a minute. Then he sent it friend n family. I have no clue(very small clue) how paypal works. But then i was able to transfer into my account and sent item. I have done a total of 4 sales so far with paypal all have been friends and family - I see nothing wrong with it as mopar family is family, and we all friends right. 2 sales happy and final, 2 sales item still in transit but will be happy also. I am one of the paypal users that asks for friends and family(i have no clue on fees) I ask for the simple reason I need the shipping paid for before I ship and really want the item paid for also. I am an honest person but YOU don't know that(I am sure a handful know this). So if you don't trust me at my word that I will do what I say in a sales transaction - I can't blame you whatsover. It just means we can't make a deal - no big deal.