Want to pose a question

A separate checking account is a good idea . Not telling her ahead of time isn't . I'm thinkin' you have more issues in your marriage than a second checking account . Marriage takes 100% commitment 100% of the time . Eventually the kids will grow up and move away (hopefully) and it will be just the two of you . Is that what you want ? Marriage is hard work . Raising kids is hard work . Both can be rewarding .