Crank end play, destroyed converter, 408 nightmare

If you took out the thrust bearing on the transmission side, most likely you didn't get the converter seated all the way into the transmission before you bolted it up. It doesn't take much to kill a thrust bearing. That's most likely what did that damage.

Now, you need to figure out why you are killing it with detonation and why it runs hot.

could always push the converter forward and backward before i bolted it to the flexplate

how many miles on this engine build? that's a lot of metal debris in the pan. I'm not totally sure, but looks like the crank thrust cheek is beginning to turn color like it may have been heating up. Is there an interference between edges of bearings and crank fillets/ no fillets.
Were you doing a lot of holding the engine at high revs and holding it against the brakes?
a brand new trans slipping on 2 to 3 shift is not very encouraging, unless you just had poorly adjusted kick down linkage.

yes it definitely have been heating up there the crank has coloured all the way round

engine must have maybe about 500miles

No big burnouts or so and now kickdown due to the full manual valve body