HELP ..Runs dies No start .. then start

Cleaned the connectors pinched them a bit, checked voltage it was 11.2 ..added grease to make sure there making contact.. zip .. when the car runs with old ecu I have moved around all the wires trying to make it fail, l've bent them and pulled on them and the car doesn't falter at all ... got a new ecu this morning (#3 this one the guy will take it back they usually won't), no go...... F!@#$%^&*(K .. I'm going to have to take this in to someone but I don't know what they can look for that we haven't.