Trying to come to a number

Grammar police strikes again!!!!!! They used to burn my *** till I won the lottery and hired this good looking gal to come in and write all my internet chit!!!!!
I was going to give each active member her $15,853 out of my extra lottery winnings, (less the grammar cops), but I hired a really, really, really good secretary. And then there was that expensive divorce!!
Yes it is true, the coma helps sometimes.
I guess but I also figure it ya can't make your way through a paragraph punctuation is not going to help.lol these are the same people that go online and see these post's that read if you can read this your one of a select few and fly threw that in two seconds it's just being silly just for the sake of doing it and to them I say ok fella's I'm stupid not good at grammar tell me something I don't know there ya go...