What's Your Best Laxitive?

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RustyRatRod

I was born on a Monday. Not last Monday.
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Yeah, you read that right. lol I'm just curious of any of the rest of yall are like me. Not that I need a laxitive at all.....never had trouble "THERE", but here's my story. I've been like this literally as long as I can remember.

Everything will be fine. Lemmie go out in the shop to work on the car, or a project.....whatever....just "out in the shop" and BAM. I gotta ****. And I don't mean just a "mild" urge. I'm talkin bout fixin to **** all over myself unless I get to the bathroom. Don't get in my way, bitches. THAT kinda urge. It's really weird, but I've always been like that. Once that comes and goes, I'm out there for hours. All is well with the world. But I've gotten to where I just prepare myself and without fail, every time, **** happens.
 
I have had the same thing happen to me, not every time but definitely often enough that it's bloody annoying, especially when I have a very dirty or messy project that I just got started with.
 
I have had the same thing happen to me, not every time but definitely often enough that it's bloody annoying, especially when I have a very dirty or messy project that I just got started with.

**** happens. lol
 
Welcome to getting older.

This has happened since I was a teenager. Kitty says it's because I get out there doin what I really like, get good and relaxed......and whoop there it is.
 
Salad, lettuce seems to promote the movement.
That being said,this is the first time i ever discussed bodily functions on the internet.
 
Tax bill, butt seriously. Any pain pill will stop me up two days or more, most any exertion-strenuous activity will get it moving again. Slightest urge don’t wait GO do the deed. Also drink a lot of water, that helps too. If eating any food that makes you run to the john, file that for future help.
 
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What's your diet like? Sounds like you need more fiber. Eat lots of oatmeal.
 
What relaxes me?????





A ********.....





Oh wait... LAXITIVE!

Sorry, never mind... drive on through now.....
 
LOL I relieve myself at the same time daily, get up at 5AM and drink one cup of coffee and out she comes. lol
have a coke at lunch and release breakfast shortly thereafter. lol
 
LOL I relieve myself at the same time daily, get up at 5AM and drink one cup of coffee and out she comes. lol
have a coke at lunch and release breakfast shortly thereafter. lol
You sound like the wife on that (says it goes right thru her) no, it takes a long time for food to go thru 22 ft of small intestine plus 4 ft of big intestine. Those Numbers might very. I’ll check again
Internet said 20 ft for small and 5 for large, I was close. What you **** is from 2-3 days ago. Under normal conditions
 
Have you considered a stool softener?
It won't make you go any faster, but it may allow things to come out easier
 
Yeah, you read that right. lol I'm just curious of any of the rest of yall are like me. Not that I need a laxitive at all.....never had trouble "THERE", but here's my story. I've been like this literally as long as I can remember.

Everything will be fine. Lemmie go out in the shop to work on the car, or a project.....whatever....just "out in the shop" and BAM. I gotta ****. And I don't mean just a "mild" urge. I'm talkin bout fixin to **** all over myself unless I get to the bathroom. Don't get in my way, bitches. THAT kinda urge. It's really weird, but I've always been like that. Once that comes and goes, I'm out there for hours. All is well with the world. But I've gotten to where I just prepare myself and without fail, every time, **** happens.
I thought I was the only one that had that problem.
 
You have all heard of "1,000 Ways to Die"? Well, my previous routine could be a show with a similar theme: I could never predict how, when, or what will come out next. And diet was not a controlling factor: healthy salads, a lot of water drinking, no salads, no water at all, nothing would regulate things.

Then about six months ago I finally gave in to taking a couple of teaspoons of psyllium with water before bedtime. Now routinely I spend about 15 seconds on the throne every morning following breakfast and done for the day! One less thing to worry about (and strain over).
 
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