Someone please help me

How many wires do you have running to your ECU box? I only seen three in the pics, are you getting the four pin resistor?

You are wasting time with the 4 pin ballast. That box is a 4 pin box and it only needs a 2 terminal resistor. The fact is, unless you run into some "new old stock," you cannot BUY a 5 pin box. The fact that the box actually has 5 pins is meaningless. The 5th pin is not connected, a dummy. The only way to tell a fake 5 pin from a real 5 pin is to ohm the "5th" pin to all the rest.

HOW DO I KNOW for certain that this is a 4 pin box? Because the transistor on the box is fake.

HOW DO you tell for sure? easy. With engine running, touch one finger to the ECU box (not the heat sink) and another finger to the transistor. If you don't get shocked, wet one finger and try again. You won't. It's fake. The real transistor on the newer replacement boxes is inside the box