Riddle me this, Batman!

Yeah that's what I'm going to try. The only thing I can think of right now is maybe I'm just waaaay advanced.

I also need to check the springs and weights in the distributor just to make sure they aren't advancing too early.
Take the springs and weights out of play. Pin them open, advance it all the way, unless your concerned about gas mileage as that’s the reason the factory had them to begin with. Close the vacuum port. Timing just got a lot easier, the result of this is when you flat peddle it all your timing is in it and you’ll have instant throttle response.