Lost my Cuz

I lost my cousin Sam yesterday and I'm beyond crushed. He was two years older than me, but we've been together all our lives. We played baseball all day as kids, until it was too dark to see the ball. Then it was football in the street, under the street lights, until our Grandfather came out and said, you mothers called and said to come home. We usually played football, summer and winter, 2 on 2 with our other two cousins who we lost some years ago. The four of us were inseparable. When we weren't playing baseball in the field, near where we lived with all the guys from the neighborhood, we played strikeout, just the four of us, against the nearest wall. We frequented many bars, smoked "pot" as teens, chased all kinds of ladies (have a real great story about that) and did it all together. He went to Nam when I was 16, and I cried on the drive home. When he came home, we hugged like it was 20 years since we had seen each other. You have to understand we grew up where my whole family lived within three blocks of my Grandfathers house. Six aunts, two uncles, and their spouses and children. My aunts, uncles and 21 cousins in our Italian neighborhood. We had war babies, boomers, and late arrivals, but we grew up close. All the holidays, and birthdays as kids, or any occasions were spent at my Grandfathers house, as it was a large house. Everybody had to at least make an appearance, before or after they were anywhere else. My Grandfather was the "Don".

My cousin Sam was 76, and seemingly in good health. Married for 52 years with three daughters, a son and nine grandchildren. A full life, thank God. Lost a kidney to cancer 6 years ago, but beat the **** out of the cancer.
We had our usual Tuesday coffee last week, with five guys we went to grammar school with. I thought we would have coffee today. He never had a heart issue, but it just stopped beating yesterday. I'm writing this as a release, because I'm in pain that I can't describe. I''ll miss him till the day I die, and see him again.