That just made me laugh my *** off!!! I had to explain to wife why I was laughing.. I'm thinking we've all been there with **** that just don't work! I feel your frustration.
I do shut off the water. I drain what I can at the lowest spigot. Gets most water out. House is all PEX plumbing so it has some flex. Seldom is there an issue unless it gets below 0 for multiple days