Father In Law Passing. What Is The Proceedure?

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  1. seabee

    seabee FABO Gold Member FABO Gold Member

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    Sorry for the off-topic subject but I figured that a lot of you have dealt with parents passing and might have some advice on what to do. My wife was given the duties of executor recently and then my Father In Law went down hard and fast. He is currently on life support and the diagnosis is that he will not make it. My MIL is still in good health but absolutely clueless to things like finances, etc..

    So here we are, with no paperwork, financial records or passwords, or even a copy of a will.

    We do know that his finances have multiple lines of credit and credit cards, a greatly underwater mortgage, several club memberships and the like. Our main concern is to make sure MIL is taken care of. We do know that he kept most of his credit cards and mortgage in his name only.

    I will be burning the midnight oil researching but would greatly appreciate any first hand experience and advice you can offer.

    Thanks,

    Seabee.
     
  2. krazykuda

    krazykuda Well-Known Member FABO Gold Member How-To Section Editor

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    Get a copy of the will. Probate court takes forever to get things settled...

    Do you have power of attorney so you can take care of the legal matters on his behalf?
     
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    • seabee

      seabee FABO Gold Member FABO Gold Member

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      We haven't located a will yet but will be searching the house tomorrow.

      Unfortunately, no power of attorney either.
       
    • daddio4048

      daddio4048 Daddios72

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      Seek out a good attorney that deals with estates.Each state has different laws when it comes to deaths in the family & what you MIL is responsible for since her name is not on any credit cards.I feel for you dealing with this with no will in place. I would urge you & your wife talk to your MIL once all the dust has settled & talk about getting a will written for her.
       
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      • goldfish65

        goldfish65 FABO Gold Member FABO Gold Member

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        Others will be more helpful but one thing I know is NOT to close any accounts right away.
         
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        • R4Sedan

          R4Sedan Larry

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          I cant't really offer any advise, I haven't had to deal with this yet. Sorry to hear of your Father in laws health issues. Things like this is hard for everyone.
           
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          • krazykuda

            krazykuda Well-Known Member FABO Gold Member How-To Section Editor

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            Have a lawyer draw up a power of attorney and have him sign it. Just a quick basic one is all that you need...
             
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            • Dodge33

              Dodge33 Well-Known Member

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              You mentioned that your wife now was given executor duties? I was thinking that also made you power of attorney, but you had mentioned there were no paperwork too. I would definitely look for a will of some kind. As for your father in laws belongings, those items will become the ownership of his wife, when he passes. Like others said, I would contact an attorney asap, as ALL other states have many different laws governing this kind of thing. I am no expert on these kinds of laws!
               
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              • Back in Time

                Back in Time Well-Known Member

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                ^^^^^^^This^^^^^^^..I was executor of my Grandmother's will and due to greedy family members the will was basically worthless. A good probate Attorney is worth every penny you pay them.Otherwise the State will end up with most of the estate....or depending on the State Laws it all just reverts to Your MIL then an Attorney that does estate planning will be the way to go.No matter what, unless you come up with an ironclad Will Attorneys will be involved. Now a real Attorney can post and give you more informed advise.Just giving you my experience. Sorry about your situation and good luck.
                 
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                • Yote

                  Yote Well-Known Member

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                  Get plenty of death certificates when the time comes. They are cheaper the first time around ( at least here ) you may need more than you think.
                  Yote
                   
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                  • Back in Time

                    Back in Time Well-Known Member

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                    Good point...I ordered 30 and used almost all of them.
                     
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                    • diymirage

                      diymirage HP@idle > hondaHP@redline

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                      sorry to hear this


                      my wife went through this last year
                      we had been in a position where we could help provide for her parents, and though they were not rich, neither one of them owed a penny to anyone

                      when time started running short for her dad things got rather complicated for her
                      being the youngest, she is also the smartest and best looking of the four and this left her in charge of a lot of decisions

                      I ran interference for her where I could, dealing with hospice, the funeral home and what not, but there were times during his last days where she interacted with him almost more in the role of a doctor than as his daughter

                      don't get me wrong, this was a great way for her to serve her father and I wouldn't have taken that away from her for the world, but at the same time, she needed to deal with this as a daughter

                      this may sound silly, but there hasn't been a day in your wife's life when that man wasn't around
                      and now there is coming a day he will no longer be

                      I would urge you to allow her to see him as his daughter
                      don't let her get too caught up in the estate deal
                       
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                      • 64DartGTinAZ

                        64DartGTinAZ FABO Gold Member FABO Gold Member

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                        This
                         
                      • RedFish

                        RedFish Well-Known Member

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                        Being mostly guys here, Take a lesson from this. Statistically we will leave our wives behind. The burden is hers with or without the support of children.
                        Its kind of ironic that we wont buy a car or boat that doesn't have a title. We fail to realize that without a will those lesser papers of today can cause major headaches tomorrow. This is why everything that isn't designated in my will is for sale.
                         
                      • seabee

                        seabee FABO Gold Member FABO Gold Member

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                        Thanks for the advice and kind words. Today we dug through hills of his old papers trying to make sense of this mess. Found a 13yr old will in a nice binder. Unfortunately it only stated the trustees and the rest was not filled out.

                        Also discovered several recent credit card bills opened in wife's name with transfered balances.

                        What a PIA this is going to be.
                         
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