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Charlie was installing a new door and found that one of the hinges was missing. He asked his wife Mary if she would go to Home Depot and pick up a hinge. Mary agreed to go. While she was waiting for the manager to finish serving a customer, her eye caught a beautiful bathroom faucet...

A man was lying in bed with his new girlfriend. After having great sex she spent the next hour just rubbing his testicles something she just loved to do. As he was enjoying it he turned to her and asked Why do you love doing that? She replied, Because I really miss mine!!

A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered.Upon their arrival, the doctor said that the hospital was testing an amazing new high-tech machine that would transfer a portion of the mother's labour pain to the baby's father. He asked if they were interested, both said they...

I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed, and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well, I couldn't believe it. He was a DWARF!!! He stormed...

On a farm out in the country lived a man, a woman and their three sons. Early one morning the woman woke up, and while looking out the window toward the pasture, she noticed the famiy's only cow lying dead in the field. The situation looked hopeless to her, how could she possibly continue to...

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he...

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'nuff said!

Hand made by your favorite Redneck. Solid mahogany. $275.00 includes shipping to Lower 48. Have 4 ready now...and enough material on hand for 5 or 6 more.

eddie is this guy who wants to have sex with this smokin' hot girl at work, but she already has a boyfriend. Time goes by, and he just can't take it anymore so he goes up to her and says " i'll give you $100.00 if you have sex with me " the girl immediately says " NO WAY ! ". Eddie says "...

Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife. A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Taser for their anniversary submitted this: Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest.. The occasion was our 15th anniversary and I was looking for a...

We have the standard 6ft. fence in the backyard, and a few months ago, I heard about burglaries increasing dramatically in the entire city. To make sure this never happened to me, I got an electric fence and ran a single wire along the top of the fence. Actually, I got the biggest cattle charger...

A lady hires a limo to take her to the airport. Not wanting to be late, she leans forward and taps the driver on the shoulder to ask for the time. The driver, suddenly startled, screams, and looses control of the limo, nearly side swipes a bus, jumps a curb and stops just inches from...

Cell phone use in the bathroom...hold on to your seat... All in all, it hadn't been a good day. Bad traffic, a malfunctioning computer, incompetent coworkers and a sore back all made me a seething cauldron of rage. But more importantly for this story, it had been over 48 hours since I'd last...

The Supreme Court has ruled that there cannot be a Nativity Scene in the United States' Capital this Christmas season. This isn't for any religious reason. They simply have not been able to find Three Wise Men in the Nation's...

The first grade class gathered around the teacher for a game of "Guess the Animal". The first picture the teacher held up was of a cat. "Okay, boys and girls," she said brightly, "can anyone tell me what this is?" "I know, I know, it's a cat!" yelled a little boy. "Very good, Eddie...

National Transportation Safety Board recently divulged they had funded a project with the US auto makers for the past five years. The NTSB covertly funded a project whereby the auto makers were installing black boxes in four wheel drive pickup trucks in an effort to determine, in fatal...

After having been served in a Las Vegas cocktail lounge, a real southern gentleman beckoned the waitress back and said quietly, "Miss, y'all sure are a luvly, luvly lady; can ah persuade y'all to give me a piece of ***?" "Lord, that's the most direct proposition I've ever had!" gasped the...

Why do 'Drivers Education' classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays? Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the 'Sex Education' class uses it

Happy Birthday to ya!!!

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Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of beer. The passenger, Bubba, said, “Lookey thar up the road, Earl, it’s a police roadblock! We’re gonna get busted fer drinkin’ these beers in tha truck!!” “Don’t worry, Bubba,” Earl said. “We’ll just...

A preacher became frustrated that a large part of his congregation was going water skiing on Sunday, rather than coming to church, so he said to his wife, “This Sunday, I’m going to preach about the evils of water skiing on Sunday.” “What!” she exclaimed. “That’s a silly thing to preach...

It was a few minutes before the services started. The congregation was seated in the pews and talking quietly. Without warning, Satan appeared at the front of the church. Everyone started screaming and running for an exit, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil...