PlumCrazyJay
70 Dart
Tavern Tales
Some A-hole looked at my beer belly in the pub last night
and sarcastically asked,
"Is that Budweiser or Pabst Blue Ribbon?"
I said,
"There's a tap underneath, taste it."
***
I was talking to a girl in the bar last night.
She said, "If you lost a few pounds, got a shave,
and got your hair cut,
you'd look pretty good."
I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there."
***
I went to the pub last night, had a shot of Ezra Brooks
and saw a fat chick dancing on a table.
I said to her, "Nice legs."
The girl giggled and said with a smile, "Do you really think so."
I said "Definitely, most tables would have collapsed by now. "
***
I was telling a girl in the pub about my ability to guess what day a
woman was born just by feeling their breasts.
"Really" she said, "Go on then... try."
After about 30 seconds of fondling she began to lose patience.
I said, Yesterday."
***
"Jesus loves you."
but it's a terrible thing to hear in a Mexican prison.
rotest: =D>:glasses7:
