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OK I know this is goofy. But tonight I found a bunch of old stuff I wrote years ago and some of it made me chuckle. I wrote this on 12-24-1997. Probably while waiting on my kids to go to sleep. LOL Memo from North Pole Police Department Re: Christmas cancellation It is my sad duty to report...

I wrote this several years ago. (9-4-1996 to be exact) I thought some of the Mopar guys might want to see it. I am in NO WAY making light of what he did. And yes he did it. If it causes a controversy, I am asking the mods beforehand to delete it. Letter from O.J. Simpson That woman is a...

1. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is. 2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong. 3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. 4. There is great...

GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED: 1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree. 2) Wrinkles don't hurt. 3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts 4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground... 5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like...

The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the...