2 Dollar Bill

[MILO]

THE $2.00 BILL I TRIED TO SPEND:



Everyone should start carrying $2 bills! I'm

STILL laughing!!

I think we need to quit saving our $2 bills

And bring them out in public.

The younger generation doesn't even know

They exist!



STORY: On my way home from work, I stopped

at Taco Bell for a quick bite to eat. I have a $50 bill

and a $2 bill. I figure with the $2 bill, I can get

something to eat and not have to worry about

irritating anyone for trying to break a $50 bill.



Me: 'Hi, I'd like one seven-layer burrito

Please, to go.'



Server: 'That'll be $1.04. Eat in?'



Me: 'No, it's to go.' At this point, I open my billfold

and hand him the $2 bill. He looks at it kind of funny.



Server: 'Uh, hang on a sec, I'll be right back.'



He goes to talk to his manager, who is still within my

earshot. The following conversation occurs between the two of them:



Server: 'Hey, you ever see a $2 bill?'

Manager: 'No. A what?'

Server: 'A $2 bill. This guy just gave it to me...'



Manager: 'Ask for something else. There's no such thing as a $2 bill.'

Server: 'Yeah, thought so.'



He comes back to me and says, 'We don't take these. Do you have

anything else?'



Me: 'Just this fifty. You don't take $2 bills? Why?

Server: 'I don't know.'

Me: 'See here where it says legal tender?'

Server: 'Yeah.'

Me: 'So, why won't you take it?'



Server: 'Well, hang on a sec.'



He goes back to his manager, who has been watching me like I'm a

shoplifter, and says to him, 'He says I have to take it.'



Manager: 'Doesn't he have anything else?'



Server: 'Yeah, a fifty. I'll get it and you can open the safe and get change.

Manager: 'I'm not opening the safe with him in here.'

Server: 'What should I do?'

Manager: 'Tell him to come back later when he has real money.'



Server: 'I can't tell him that! You tell him.'

Manager: 'Just tell him.'

Server: 'No way! This is weird. I'm going in back.



The manager approaches me and says,

'I'm sorry, but we don't take big bills this time of night.'



Me: 'It's only seven o'clock! Well then, here's a two dollar bill.'

Manager: 'We don't take those, either.'

Me: 'Why not?'

Manager: 'I think you know why.'

Me: 'No really, tell me why.'



Manager: 'Please leave before I call mall security.'

Me: 'Excuse me?'

Manager: 'Please leave before I call mall security.'

Me: 'What on earth for?'

Manager: 'Please, sir..'



Me: 'Uh, go ahead, call them.'

Manager: 'Would you please just leave?'

Me: 'No.'

Manager: 'Fine -- have it your way then.'

Me: 'Hey, that's Burger King, isn't it?'



At this point, he backs away from me and calls mall security

on the phone around the corner. I have two people staring at

me from the dining area, and I begin laughing out loud, just for effect.



A few minutes later this 45-year-oldish guy comes in.



Guard: 'Yeah, Mike, what's up?'

Manager (whispering): 'This guy is trying to give me some (pause)

funny money.'

Guard: 'No kidding! What?'

Manager: 'Get this. A two dollar bill.'



Guard (incredulous): 'Why would a guy fake a two dollar bill?'

Manager: 'I don't know. He's kinda weird. He says the only other thing he

Has is a fifty.'

Guard: 'Oh, so the fifty's fake!'

Manager: 'No, the two dollar bill is.'



Guard: 'Why would he fake a two dollar bill?'

Manager : 'I don't know! Can you talk to him, and get him out of here?'

Guard: 'Yeah.'



Security Guard walks over to me and......

Guard: 'Mike here tells me you have some fake bills you're trying to use.'



Me: 'Uh, no.'

Guard: 'Lemme see 'em.'

Me: 'Why?'

Guard: 'Do you want me to get the cops in here?'



At this point I'm ready to say, 'Sure, please!.' but I want to eat, so I say,

'I'm just trying to buy a burrito and pay for it with this two dollar bill.’



I put the bill up near his face, and he flinches like I'm taking a swing at him.

He takes the bill, turns it over a few times in his hands, and he says,

'Hey, Mike, what's wrong with this bill?'



Manager: 'It's fake.'

Guard: 'It doesn't look fake to me.'

Manager: 'But it's a two dollar bill.'

Guard: 'Yeah? '

Manager: 'Well, there's no such thing, is there?'



The security guard and I both look at him like he's an idiot and it dawns

on the guy that he has no clue and is an idiot.



So, it turns out that my burrito was free, and he threw in a small drink

and some of those cinnamon thingies, too.



Made me want to get a whole stack of two dollar bills just to see what

happens when I try to buy stuff.



Just think... those two are of the age to be voting!!!

 

[4spdragtop]

Thats frickin hilarious! Good one!!

 

[sr71mopar]

I always keep a two on me.

 

[68gtxman]

Funny! Some military bases paid their guys in the 1950s with a stack of two dollar bills, so the local community would know how much money the GIs spent there.

 

[MOBodyman]

I've carried a $2 bill for so long it's almost worn out. I was working really late one night at the shop and there was a knock on the door. There was a little elderly man there who had walked over from the post office parking lot. He had stopped there for some reason and now his old Rambler wouldn't start. I took my vehicle over and gave him a jump. He tried to pay me but I didn't want to charge him anything. So he said, 'here's a $2 bill for good luck" or something to that effect. I figured if I always carried it I would never be broke.
Dallas

 

[plum crazy dart]

That's hilarious. I've had similar experiences with $2's, presidential dollar coins, and sacajawea $1 coins but usually the manager has a clue. I had my bank branch order a sleeve of two's for me and had a blast paying for stuff with them. Had a cashier put his own $20 bill in the register so he could keep the 10 two's I gave him.