Best Christmas cake ever.

[dartcuda]

Christmas Cake
> >
> > Ingredients:
> >
> > * 2 cups flour
> > * 1 stick butter
> > * 1 cup of water
> > * 1 tsp baking soda
> > * 1 cup of sugar
> > * 1 tsp salt
> > * 1 cup of brown sugar
> > * Lemon juice
> > * 4 large eggs
> >
> > * Nuts
> > * 1 bottle tequila
> > * 2 cups of dried fruit
> >
> > Sample the tequila to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the
> > tequila again. To be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level
>
> > cup and drink.
> > Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large
>
> > fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.
> > At this point it's
> >
> > best to make sure the tequila is still OK. Try another cup... Just in
>
> > case. Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 eggs and add to the bowl
> > and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.
> >
> > Pick the frigging fruit up off floor. Mix on the turner. If the
> > fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a
> > drewscriver. Sample the tequila to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift
> > two cups of salt. Or something.
> > Check the tequila. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
> > Add
> >
> > one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or some fink.
> > Whatever you can find.
> > Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall
> > over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl
> > through the window. Finish the tequila and wipe counter with the cat.
> >
> > Bingle Jells!
>