dartman340ta
Well-Known Member
To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown
> Savannah night before last.
> Date: 2009-05-27, 1:43 a.m. E.S.T.
>
> I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you
> demanded
> that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me
> and my girlfriend,
> threatening our lives. You also asked for my
> girlfriend's purse and earrings. I
> can only hope that you somehow come across this rather
> important
> message.
> First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment;
> I didn't
> expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my
> pistol after you took
> my jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing
> the jacket for a
> reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model
> 1911 .45 ACP pistol
> for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster
> for it that very
> evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating
> weapon when pointed
> at your head ... isn't it?!
> I know it probably wasn't fun walking
> back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge
> in your pants. I'm sure
> it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you
> leave your shoes, cell
> phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling
> or running to your
> buddies to come help mug us again].
> After I called your mother, or
> "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I
> explained the entire episode of
> what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank
> as well as those of four
> other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card.
> The guy with the big
> motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful!
>
> I gave your
> shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's,
> along with all the cash in
> your wallet. [That made his day!]
> I then threw your wallet into the
> big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the
> curb ... after I broke the
> windshield and side window and keyed the entire
> driver's side of the
> car.
> Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your
> cell
> phone.. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I
> only used the phone for
> a little over a day now, so what 's going on with that?
> Earlier, I managed to
> get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office
> and one to the FBI, while
> mentioning President Obama as my possible target.
> The FBI guy seemed
> really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while
> he traced your number
> etc.).
> In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you
> ...
> but I feel this type of retribution is a far more
> appropriate punishment for
> your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort
> through some of these
> rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that
> you have the
> opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the
> career path you've
> chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not
> be so lucky. Have a
> good day!
> Thoughtfully yours,
> Alex
> P.S. Remember
> this motto ... An armed society makes for a more civil
> society!
> Savannah night before last.
> Date: 2009-05-27, 1:43 a.m. E.S.T.
>
> I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you
> demanded
> that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me
> and my girlfriend,
> threatening our lives. You also asked for my
> girlfriend's purse and earrings. I
> can only hope that you somehow come across this rather
> important
> message.
> First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment;
> I didn't
> expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my
> pistol after you took
> my jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing
> the jacket for a
> reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model
> 1911 .45 ACP pistol
> for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster
> for it that very
> evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating
> weapon when pointed
> at your head ... isn't it?!
> I know it probably wasn't fun walking
> back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge
> in your pants. I'm sure
> it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you
> leave your shoes, cell
> phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling
> or running to your
> buddies to come help mug us again].
> After I called your mother, or
> "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I
> explained the entire episode of
> what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank
> as well as those of four
> other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card.
> The guy with the big
> motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful!
>
> I gave your
> shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's,
> along with all the cash in
> your wallet. [That made his day!]
> I then threw your wallet into the
> big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the
> curb ... after I broke the
> windshield and side window and keyed the entire
> driver's side of the
> car.
> Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your
> cell
> phone.. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I
> only used the phone for
> a little over a day now, so what 's going on with that?
> Earlier, I managed to
> get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office
> and one to the FBI, while
> mentioning President Obama as my possible target.
> The FBI guy seemed
> really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while
> he traced your number
> etc.).
> In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you
> ...
> but I feel this type of retribution is a far more
> appropriate punishment for
> your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort
> through some of these
> rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that
> you have the
> opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the
> career path you've
> chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not
> be so lucky. Have a
> good day!
> Thoughtfully yours,
> Alex
> P.S. Remember
> this motto ... An armed society makes for a more civil
> society!
