It was so hot...
All the corn on the stalks started popping and flying through
the air. The cows thought it was snowing. And they froze to death.
It's so hot, I saw squirrels fanning their nuts.
The potatoes cook underground and all you have to do to have
lunch is to pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.
Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them
from laying hard boiled eggs.
the cows are giving evaporated milk.
the trees are whistlin' for the dogs.
Satan decided to take the day off.
Even the sun was looking for some shade!
the birds had to pick up the worms with potholders.
I saw a dog chasing a cat and they were both walkin'..
that Dennis Rodman went out without a bra!
The chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs..
Two trees fighting over a dog....
the workers at the chicken place were jumping in the fry vat
just to cool off
I saw a fire hydrant begging a dog to pee on it
Calista Flockhart of "Ally McBeal" was spotted eating some ice cream.
And she almost ate a second spoonful.
Dennis Rodman, the colorful basketball player, was spotted wearing a
bikini. And some people are already wondering if he's cute enough to
appear in Sports Illustrated's swimsuit issue, proving that they've all
been out in the sun too long.
Scientists recently detected beads of sweat on the Statue of Liberty.
But they're still searching for signs of life on Al Gore.
Campbell Soup Co. has changed the directions on its cans to,
"Just pour and eat."
Water in public swimming pools is evaporating so fast that children
are being encouraged to swim in the deep end and keep ignoring the,
"no peeing" rule.
As if the heat isn't bad enough, in many parts of the country,
including Pennsylvania, people are suffering through a persistent
drought, one that has been especially hard on farmers. Not only
are their crops wilting, some of their dairy cows are producing
powdered milk. Don't be surprised if milk cartons in the stores
soon display this label: 2% milk, 98% air.
It's no wonder that some states are imposing drastic restrictions
on water use. Among them:
New Jersey:
No bathing or showering more than once a month. Bathing in the ocean
or in pairs is encouraged.
Michigan:
American cars must not be washed more than once a week. Washing
Japanese cars is strictly prohibited. German cars may be driven
into the lake.
New York:
No drinking more than four glasses of water a day. Beer may be
consumed at will.
Minnesota:
Anyone who wastes water will be asked to wrestle the governor.
Pennsylvania:
Private swimming pools must not be filled or topped off. The
governor's pool is exempt.
Texas:
Illegal aliens are not allowed to drink American water. They must
bring their own.
Thanks for your service dusted72 !!!
Keep hydrated.
TXDart
All the corn on the stalks started popping and flying through
the air. The cows thought it was snowing. And they froze to death.
It's so hot, I saw squirrels fanning their nuts.
The potatoes cook underground and all you have to do to have
lunch is to pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.
Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them
from laying hard boiled eggs.
the cows are giving evaporated milk.
the trees are whistlin' for the dogs.
Satan decided to take the day off.
Even the sun was looking for some shade!
the birds had to pick up the worms with potholders.
I saw a dog chasing a cat and they were both walkin'..
that Dennis Rodman went out without a bra!
The chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs..
Two trees fighting over a dog....
the workers at the chicken place were jumping in the fry vat
just to cool off
I saw a fire hydrant begging a dog to pee on it
Calista Flockhart of "Ally McBeal" was spotted eating some ice cream.
And she almost ate a second spoonful.
Dennis Rodman, the colorful basketball player, was spotted wearing a
bikini. And some people are already wondering if he's cute enough to
appear in Sports Illustrated's swimsuit issue, proving that they've all
been out in the sun too long.
Scientists recently detected beads of sweat on the Statue of Liberty.
But they're still searching for signs of life on Al Gore.
Campbell Soup Co. has changed the directions on its cans to,
"Just pour and eat."
Water in public swimming pools is evaporating so fast that children
are being encouraged to swim in the deep end and keep ignoring the,
"no peeing" rule.
As if the heat isn't bad enough, in many parts of the country,
including Pennsylvania, people are suffering through a persistent
drought, one that has been especially hard on farmers. Not only
are their crops wilting, some of their dairy cows are producing
powdered milk. Don't be surprised if milk cartons in the stores
soon display this label: 2% milk, 98% air.
It's no wonder that some states are imposing drastic restrictions
on water use. Among them:
New Jersey:
No bathing or showering more than once a month. Bathing in the ocean
or in pairs is encouraged.
Michigan:
American cars must not be washed more than once a week. Washing
Japanese cars is strictly prohibited. German cars may be driven
into the lake.
New York:
No drinking more than four glasses of water a day. Beer may be
consumed at will.
Minnesota:
Anyone who wastes water will be asked to wrestle the governor.
Pennsylvania:
Private swimming pools must not be filled or topped off. The
governor's pool is exempt.
Texas:
Illegal aliens are not allowed to drink American water. They must
bring their own.
Thanks for your service dusted72 !!!
Keep hydrated.
TXDart
