How to shower like a man/woman

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EvilScamp

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Part 1: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
>
> Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to
> lights and darks.
>
> Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
>
> If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>
> *Look at your womanly physique in the mirror.
>
> * Make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
>
> *Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah,
> wide loofah and pumice stone.
>
> *Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
> vitamins.
>
> *Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
>
> *Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner.
>
> *Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes u ntil
> red.
>
> *Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
>
> *Rinse conditioner off hair.
>
> *Shave armpits and legs.
>
> *Turn off shower.
>
> *Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
>
> *Spray mold spots with Tilex.
>
> *Get out of shower.
>
> *Dry with towel the size of a small country.
>
> *Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
>
> *Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you
> see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.


> Part 2: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
>
> *Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in
> a pile.
>
> *Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener
> at her while making the woo-woo sound.
>
> *Look at your manly physique i n the mirror.
> > *Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ***.
>
> *Get in the shower.
>
> *Wash your face.
>
> *Wash your armpits.
>
> *Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse the snot off.
>
> *Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
>
> *Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
>
> *Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
>
> *Wash your hair. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
>
> *Pee.
>
> *Rinse off and get out of shower.
>
> *Partially dry off.
>
> *Fail to notice water on floor because the curtain was hanging out of
> tub the whole time.
>
> *Admire wiener size in mirror again.
>
> *Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

> *Return to bedroom with towel around waist ..
>
>
> *If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the
> woo-woo sound again.
>
> *Throw wet towel on her pillow.
>
>
> If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this,
> there is something SO very wrong with you. Have a great day!
>
> Oh, and.... woo woo!!!

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Top of the line true story!! ROTFL!!
Can't wait to show that one to the wife.

She has a half of a bushel of stuff in the shower !!
Know I know what they do with it.

Thanks for a good laugh Evil!!!!!!!!!!!:toothy10:
 
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