Translations for men,Vol.1

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[FONT=times new roman,helvetica]These translations are for all of you wonderful women out there, so that you will know what they really mean when your man says...
1. "IT'S A GUY THING"

Translated:* "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."

2. "CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"

Translated:* "Why isn't it already on the table?"

3."UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR"

Translated:* Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

4. "IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"

Translated:* "I have no idea how it works."

5. "TAKE A BREAK, HONEY. YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD."

Translated:* "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

6. "THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."

Translated:* "Are you still talking?"

7. "YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."

Translated:* "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop,' the address of the first girl I ever kissed and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned... but I forgot your birthday."

8. "OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF. IT'S NO BIG DEAL."

Translated:* "I have actually severed a limb but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."

9. "HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING."

Translated:* "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."

10. "I CAN'T FIND IT."

Translated:* "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."

11. "WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"

Translated:* "What did you catch me at?"

12. "I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."

Translated:* "No one will ever see us alive again."

13. "WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK."

Translated:* "I make the messes; she cleans them up."


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[memike]

One that always worked for me.:toothy10:

I will be right back hun, Jims lawn mower wont start and the city is on him to get it cut,:-D
10 dolors for the boy that mowed the yard:-D and 15 dolors
for a twelve pack :drinkers:and return three our later and say we finally got that darn mower running:angry7: and I stayed and helped him get it dun.
I think I deserve a beer don't you deer.:-D

I am so proud to be a man :cheers:

Thanks M.G treva had a laugh out of them too.

 

[70dart]

Gee the number 8. "OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF. IT'S NO BIG DEAL."

Translated:* "I have actually severed a limb but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."

Sounds very familiar, according to my wife: When she said she was calling an ambulance when I took my stroke, I told her I didn't need one, and I would get the problem straighened out. A few minutes later I was unconscious for 5 days! Go figure!

 

[Longgone]

It`s amazing how funny the truth is.

 

[Bigdummy]

lol

 

[BWDart]

I always used "I'll be back in an hour" just didn't specify which hour.

 

[RPM]

.........sad but true..... women are finally on to us guys.... we need a new lingo....