Had To Rush A Cat To The Vet...

[RustyRatRod]

She ate Christmas tree lights. When the doc said she'd be alright, her little face just lit up.

 

[harrisonm]

Here is a Joke I tell that always goes over well.
My wife has a sister (Susan) that is two years younger than her. When Susan was about 4, she put their cat in the freezer. Her mother found it when she opened the freezer to take out something for dinner, she found the cat. It was frosty and a little stiff, but its heart was beating. She immediately called the vet. The vet asked if she had any turpentine, and mom said no. Amy kerosine? No. Any gas? Yes, we have a can of gas. The vet said to put a little gas in an eye dropper and force it down the cat's throat and then bring it in. So mom did that, and the cat actually got up, stretched, walked about 20 feel and fell over.
Invariably, at this point, someone asks me if the cat died. I answer back with, "No. It just ran out of gas.

 

[RustyRatRod]

Here is a Joke I tell that always goes over well.
My wife has a sister (Susan) that is two years younger than her. When Susan was about 4, she put their cat in the freezer. Her mother found it when she opened the freezer to take out something for dinner, she found the cat. It was frosty and a little stiff, but its heart was beating. She immediately called the vet. The vet asked if she had any turpentine, and mom said no. Amy kerosine? No. Any gas? Yes, we have a can of gas. The vet said to put a little gas in an eye dropper and force it down the cat's throat and then bring it in. So mom did that, and the cat actually got up, stretched, walked about 20 feel and fell over.
Invariably, at this point, someone asks me if the cat died. I answer back with, "No. It just ran out of gas.

LMAO

 

[pauly]

Wow! That’s all I got!!

 

[diymirage]

Here is a Joke I tell that always goes over well.
My wife has a sister (Susan) that is two years younger than her. When Susan was about 4, she put their cat in the freezer. Her mother found it when she opened the freezer to take out something for dinner, she found the cat. It was frosty and a little stiff, but its heart was beating. She immediately called the vet. The vet asked if she had any turpentine, and mom said no. Amy kerosine? No. Any gas? Yes, we have a can of gas. The vet said to put a little gas in an eye dropper and force it down the cat's throat and then bring it in. So mom did that, and the cat actually got up, stretched, walked about 20 feel and fell over.
Invariably, at this point, someone asks me if the cat died. I answer back with, "No. It just ran out of gas.

Thats how we used to make cats bark, douse em in gasoline, light a match and WOOFFF