For all of those that have worked hard to put on a car show or car event (thank you) and for others who have never helped but only complained this is for you!
The Ballad of the Participation Trophy
The car show field was shining bright,Chrome reflecting morning light.The hot rods sparkled, paint did glow,But trouble brewed before Best of Show.
For gathered there in lawn chairs wide,Sat grown men nursing wounded pride.With folded arms and furrowed brow,Demanding justice, here and now.
"I've spent three grand on ceramic coat!"One loudly cried and nearly choked."My Corvette's flawless, can't you see?That trophy clearly belongs to me!"
Another wailed, "This judging's shady!My car's been detailed more than my old lady.The engine bay's so clean and neat,You could perform surgery from the seat!"
One fellow stomped and raised a fuss,"That rusty hot rod beat us?Why should craftsmanship be praised When mine was financed and dealer-glazed?"
Perhaps it's time the shows evolve,And finally help these wounds resolve.
Create a class for Still Under Warranty, Where bravery's measured by the dealership guarantee
Add Best New Car Smell to the list,For those new car owners shaking their fist..
Present a plaque for Lowest Mileage Hero, For those who trailer twenty miles to travel zero.
Let's honor Best White New Balance Shoes,A Corvette driver's favorite when out for a cruise.Judged on brightness, width, and shine,With minus points as a grass stain fine.
Create Most Impressive Window Sticker,For buyers who negotiated quicker.
A special trophy should be made, For every ego left dismayed.A twelve-foot cup, perhaps of gold,For stories exaggerated and told.
"I had one faster back in '98.""I owned six Hemi cars that were great.""I know the judges personally.""I would've won if not for politics, see."
Yet while the grumbling filled the air,The real enthusiasts didn't care.They laughed with friends and shared a tale, and watched upset grown men growing more pale
Because the point was never glory, Nor adding trophies to the story.It's cars, old friends, and gasoline,The finest therapy ever seen.
So if you lose, don't stomp and pout, Or threaten never to come back out.Just smile, shake hands, and enjoy the day—
And pick up your Participation Trophy on your way.
















