Jeff Gordon Fires Entire Pit Crew

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Mark Wainwright

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Jeff Gordon Fires Pit Crew Raleigh, NC Jeff Gordon announced today he has fired his entire pit crew. This announcement followed Gordon's decision to take advantage of Newt Gingrich's scheme to employ Harlem youngsters. The decision to hire them was brought about by a recent documentary on how unemployed youths from Harlem were able to remove a set of wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Gordon's existing crew could only do it in 8 seconds with thousands of dollars' worth of high tech equipment.



It was thought to be an excellent and bold move by Gordon's management team, as many races are won or lost in the pits.



However, Gordon got more than he bargained for. At the crew's first practice session, not only was the inexperienced crew able to change all

4 wheels in under 6 seconds, but within 9 seconds they had changed the paint scheme, altered the VIN number, and sold the car to Dale Earnhardt Jr. For 10 cases of Bud, a bag of weed, and some photos of Jeff Gordon's wife in the shower.
 
Jeff Gordon Fires Pit Crew Raleigh, NC Jeff Gordon announced today he has fired his entire pit crew. This announcement followed Gordon's decision to take advantage of Newt Gingrich's scheme to employ Harlem youngsters. The decision to hire them was brought about by a recent documentary on how unemployed youths from Harlem were able to remove a set of wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Gordon's existing crew could only do it in 8 seconds with thousands of dollars' worth of high tech equipment.



It was thought to be an excellent and bold move by Gordon's management team, as many races are won or lost in the pits.



However, Gordon got more than he bargained for. At the crew's first practice session, not only was the inexperienced crew able to change all

4 wheels in under 6 seconds, but within 9 seconds they had changed the paint scheme, altered the VIN number, and sold the car to Dale Earnhardt Jr. For 10 cases of Bud, a bag of weed, and some photos of Jeff Gordon's wife in the shower.
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
 
I remember when Gordon wrecked out in one race, Martinsville, I believe. Johnson had a bad pit stop afterwards. Chad Knaus benched the entire crew, and put Gordons' crew in instead. By next weekend, both teams had made the swap permanent.
 
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