Post your favorite saying

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everytime we would ask the ol man for something he would always answer" you should wish in one hand and **** in the other ,let me know which fills up faster"and if you asked him for money he would say "can your dick reach your ***?"if you say no he d say come back when it does,if you said yes he d say "good, then go fu*k yourself"
 
When someone is complaining to me about something stupid ........"And your cry baby, whiny a$$ point is....... ??????????"
 
If it's jammed, force it. If it breaks then you needed a new one anyways. ---my dad

Life is composed of 'oh *****' and 'atta boys'. One 'oh ****' wipes out 10 'atta boys' though. -----my dad

"If you're going through Hell keep on going" ---Winston Churchill
 
"The reason most people miss opportunity is because it usually comes dressed in coveralls and looks like work!"

"If they run, they're VC. If they don't run, they're well disciplined VC."

"Incoming fire has the right of way."

"Friendly fire.......isn't"

"If you fortify your position so much that you leave the enemy with no way in, you'll leave yourself with no way out."

"The easy way out is always mined."

"There are no convenient foxholes."

"If the enemy is in range, so are you."

"If it looks or sounds stupid but it works, then it isn't stupid."

"Things that must be assembled together to make them work usually have parts that are shipped in separate containers."

"If at first you don't succeed, call in an airstrike."

"When in doubt, empty your magazine."

"It's not the bullet with your name on it you should be concerned about, it's the one addressed, 'To whom it may concern.' "

"When the pin is pulled, Mr Grenade is not your friend."

"Any ship can be a minesweeper............once."
 
Grand father always told me do the right thing for the right reason
 
A few of my favorites:
" that boy is so stupid he couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel"

"Harder than woodpecker lips"

"everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth"
 
That sticks out like a woodie in sweat pants...

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder...

Beauty is just a light switch away...

I drink to make you more interesting...
 
From the late great Rodney Dangerfield.

"You must have looked good before electricity".
 
I have two sayings

1. It's better then a kick in the *** with a frozen boot!

2. I don't give 2 sh*t's and a f*ck
 
"The only thing i want, is the last thing i need" - Joel Zimmerman

"Bad pennies always turn up" - Christine By Stephen King

"One of them dodge chargers let him go by" - Two Lane Blacktop
 
You can hang earrings on a sow and call it a beauty queen, it don't change the fact it's still a pig.
 
Quote ,from 2 Lane Blacktop,by James Taylor, no less." Make it 300 yards(dollars) motherfu*ker,we'll have an automobile race!" Sorry about the language,simply a great line.....
 
love that movie, here's one,keep it simple stupid!he's so old he farts dust...
 
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