Colder than a witches tit in a brass bra
Slicker than snot on a door knob
If it don't run chrome it, that's for the Cheby guys
Dead Nuts - When the measurement is right on
Lifes a ***** then you marry one - Been there done that
Mt favorite from my Dad (RIP) Don't worry what someone else is doing, worry what your doing
Dumber than a box of rocks