sitting in a bar

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avarageerod

avarageerod

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I was in the pub yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to fart. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my farts with the beat. After a couple of songs, I started to feel better.I finished my drink and noticed that everybody was staring at me.


Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.
 
Fart Joke: An elderly couple were attending church services. About halfway through she leans over and says, " I just let out a silent fart, what do you think I should do?" He replies, " Put a new battery in your hearing aid."

this is my favorite.
 
I love fart jokes...but then my wife says I have the sense of humor of a sixth grader.
 
A little old couple prepares to go to bed. They no sooner hit the pillows when the old man farts and says, "Seven Points."

His wife rolls over and says, "What in the world was that?"

The old man replied, "It's fart football."

A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says, "Touchdown, tie score."

After about five minutes the old man lets another one go and says, "Aha. I'm ahead 14 to 7."

Not to be outdone, the wife rips out another one and says, "Touchdown, tie score."

Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says, "Field goal, I lead 17 to 14."

Now the pressure is on the old man. He refuses to get beat by a woman, so he strains real hard, but to no avail. Realizing a defeat is totally unacceptable he gives it everything he's got, and accidentally he ***** in the bed. The wife says, "What the hell was that?"

The old man says, "Half time, switch sides."
 
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