Two Newfies

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Bad Sport

HALF A BUBBLE OFF
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Two Newfies walk into a pet shop in St. John's and walk over to the bird section and Gerry says to George, 'Dat's dem.'

The owner comes over and asks if he can help them.

'Yeah, we'll take four of dem dere little budgies in dat cage up dere,' says George.

The owner puts the budgies in a cardboard box.

George and Gerry pay for the birds, leave the shop and get into Gerry's truck to drive to the top of Signal Hill.

At Signal Hill Gerry looks down at the 1000 foot drop and says, 'Dis looks like a grand place.'

He takes two birds out of the box, puts one on each shoulder and jumps off the cliff.

George watches as the budgies fly off and Gerry falls all the way to the bottom, killing himself stone dead.

Looking down at the remains of his best pal, George shakes his head and says, 'Fook dat. Dis budgie jumping is too fook'n dangerous for me!'

THERE'S MORE...

Moment's later; Seamus arrives.

He's been to the pet shop too and walks up to the edge of the cliff carrying another cardboard box in one hand and a shotgun in the other.

'Hi, George, watch dis,' Seamus says.

He takes a parrot from the box and lets him fly free.

He then throws himself over the edge of the cliff with the gun.

George watches as half way down, Seamus takes the gun and shoots the parrot.

Seamus continues to plummet down and down until he hits the bottom and breaks every bone in his body.

George shakes his head and says, 'And I'm never trying dat parrotshooting neither!'

IT IS NOT OVER YET...

George is just getting over the shock of losing two friends when Bren appears.

He's also been to the pet shop and is carrying a cardboard box out of which he pulls a chicken.

Bren then takes the chicken by its legs and hurls himself off the cliff and disappears down until he hits a rock and breaks his spine.

Once more George shakes his head.

'Fook dat, lads. First dere was Gerry with his budgie jumping, den Seamus parrotshooting... And now Bren and his fook'n hengliding!'
 
...and all this time I thought it was just folks from Minnesnowta that talk funny...donchaknow
 

It's funnier if you've actually met newfies. First time I met one at the "baaaarrr" and I couldn't understand him to save my life. Think south boston accent, but really thick and heavy.
 
Don't forget to throw in a ton of backwards talk to go with the accent such as "Where ya be at by ?"
 
having lived in your state for 10+ years and being familiar wid da yupers I can tell you the two dialects are nothing alike .
 
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