When you are over sixty

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spl440

Everybody's Fool
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Over 60, Who Gives a ****?



I was standing at the bar one night, minding my own business. This FAT ugly chick came up behind me,

grabbed my *** and said, "You're kind of cute you gotta phone number?" I said, "Yea you gotta pen?"

She said "Yea", I got a pen".

I said, "You better get back in it before the farmer misses you". Cost me 6 stitches


When you are over sixty . . . who gives a ****?







Cowboy: "Give me 3 packets of condoms, please."

Cashier: "Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?"

Cowboy: "Nah.. She's purty good lookin'....."


When you are over sixty, who gives a ****?

***********



I was talking to a girl in the bar last night. She said,

"If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right."

I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you."


When you are over sixty, who gives a ****?

***********



I was telling a girl in the pub about my ability to guess what day a woman was born just by feeling her boobs.

"Really" she said, "Go on then...try."

After about thirty seconds of fondling she began to lose patience and said, "Come on, what day was I born?"

I said, "Yesterday."


When you are over sixty, who gives a ****?

***********



I got caught taking a pee in the swimming pool today.

The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in.


When you are over sixty, who gives a ****?

***********



I went to the pub last night and saw a FAT chick dancing on a table. I said, "Good legs."

The girl giggled and said, "Do you really think so."

I said, "Definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now."


When you are over sixty, who gives a ****?
 
I turned 60 in June. LMFAO Good ones!
 
Tha's some pretty good stuff. How bout when you are WAY over sixty?
 

A woman in the line at the grocery store notices a guy drunk off his *** in line behind her doing an item by item visual scan of everything in her shopping cart.
She turns and looks at the guy and he looks up with a big smile and says "You must be single".
The woman a bit surprised how he could tell that from the contents of her cart say's "Yes I am, but how did you know?"
The drunk guy say's "Because you are uglier than ****!".
 
-Jesus H. Christ LMAO..................... this is what I got to look forwards in then when I get to 60???????
 
All the above sounds like Benny Hill that I heard back in the 70's when I discovered him!!! HYSTERICAL!!!!
Discovered as in became aware of him!
 
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