12 Dad jokes

[Yunick13]

 

[joel d. snyder]

evening folks......1. knock knock. who's there? voodoo. voodoo who? voodoo you think you are, asking me so many questions. 2. why is yoda such a good gardener? because he has green thumbs. i hear shrek is pretty good too.

 

[joel d. snyder]

1. what is the difference between a cat and a comma? one has the paws before the claws and the other has the clause before the pause. 2. a mushroom walks into a bar (don't ask me how) and orders a drink. the bartender says "i can't serve you." the mushroom says "why not? i'm a fun-guy!

 

[joel d. snyder]

hello, folks......1. what fast food chain is most likely to win a basketball tournament? dunkin' donuts. 2. how does a cucumber become a pickle? it goes through a jarring experience.

 

[Yunick13]

 

[joel d. snyder]

thanks! i love the muppets.

 

[joel d. snyder]

this evening's entertainment......1. did you hear about the girl who fell off the toilet? she was so embarrassed, her cheeks flushed. 2. dogs can't operate mri scans. but catscan.

 

[joel d. snyder]

and now the moment you've all been waiting for......1.what do you call a cat who likes to swim? an octopuss. 2. how do trees get online? they just log on.

 

[Yunick13]

 

[Yunick13]

 

[Ahoey]

I remember watching that

 

[joel d. snyder]

thank you, i love the muppets......1.how do you make a waterbed more bouncy? add spring water. 2. what's invisible and smells like carrots? rabbit farts.

 

[jrc4y4]

My son shares one dad joke per day with his teachers. I’m going to give him some of these groaners.

 

[Yunick13]

 

[joel d. snyder]

My son shares one dad joke per day with his teachers. I’m going to give him some of these groaners.

groaners? these are top shelf material. 1. what is it called when a dinosaur gets a goal? a dino-score. 2. why did the student throw his watch out the window? because he wanted to see time fly.

 

[Yunick13]

 

[Yunick13]

 

[joel d. snyder]

and now for your enjoyment....1.why was the broom late for school? he over swept. 2. i'm just a social drinker. every time someone says "i'll have a drink" i say "social i."

 

[Yunick13]

 

[joel d. snyder]

1. what do you call a broke santa? saint nickel-less. 2.what is beethoven's favorite fruit? a ba-na-na-na.

 

[joel d. snyder]

1. what happens if you boil a funny bone? you get a laughing stock. 2. why do people go to a sports stadium on a hot day? because it's full of fans.

 

[joel d. snyder]

happy friday to my loyal fans ....1. what do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? frostbite 2. i understand how batteries feel because i'm often not included either.

 

[Yunick13]

 

[missing linc]

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom? Because the 'p' is silent.

 

[joel d. snyder]

evening folks ......1. what do fish sing during the holidays? christmas corals. 2. why did the envelope take so long to get ready? because it had to get addressed.