Crazy car fixes/repairs

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rp23g7

rp23g7

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So, here i am, slow day at work, with the next subject to talk about.

What is the craziest fix or repair you have done to your car to nurse it home from the middle of nowhere?

Mine?? this was in 82 0r 83. Well, we were on a cruise home from Vantage in Washington from a concert, pretty much the middle of nowhere, at 3 in the morning, driving my 64 Custom 880.

My engine started running like garbage going up a hill, knocking and bucking, for 30 sec or so, then it smoothed out. Strange. I slowed down to stop on the side of the road to check it out, hit the brakes, and nothing happened, straight to the floor. @$#$#%.

Parking Braked my self to a stop and looked in my master cylinder. Nothing in it, WTF. I didnt have any brake fluid in my bag of tricks. And i was 30 miles from the pass. HMMM. WTF. Middle of the night, nobody around, we had a 6 pack of beer still with us. I loosened up my bleeder screws and poured beer in my master cylinder, and saw a fluid trail down the booster on the firewall, hmm cracked diaphram? I think the bad running engine was from it sucking the fluid up.

I took the vacume line off and plugged it, me and my buddy bled the brakes till beer came out.

Tried the brakes, a little spongy, but they stopped the car, if you were gentle.

So we drove 30 or so miles up the pass till be got to a open gas station.

Best part? Well, we were pulling into the gas station it took a couple of stops to get there. And the brakes were getting bad, stopped and bought some brake fluid, took the cover off of the master. WOO HOO BEER STEAM GEYSER. Bled the brakes and cruised on home, woot
 
That worked because brake fluid is water soluble. When I was reading this I thought you put something else in it... like Beer after it passes thru the human body.


I used pepper and cream of wheat for stop leak once.


Chuck
 
I've always got a gallon jug of oil and one of tranny fluid in my vehicle.. tranny fluid probably would work, I think.

About 12 years ago, I had a rottenass '82 Buick. While driving down a back road I probably shouldn't have, the exhaust broke in half between the cat and the muffler, leaving a lacey 4 inch gap. I didn't have any exhaust tubing or muffler clamps with me of course, but I did have plenty of bee- I mean, soda cans rattling around in the back, a couple hoseclamps, and a utility knife. Cut the top & bottom off one can, "sleeved" the inside of the broken pipe, then another (slit up the side) on the outside, hoseclamped in place. Lasted long enough to get home, about 15 miles.
 
I was driving my old Dakota one day and it started backfiring, bucking and kicking so I stopped to have a look. The plate in the dizzy that tells the plugs when to fire had broken off the plastic rivets. I got my trusty butane lighter out, heated up the end of a screwdriver and melted the plastic enough to hold the plate in place and made it home.

Jack
 
340mopar said:
That worked because brake fluid is water soluble. When I was reading this I thought you put something else in it... like Beer after it passes thru the human body.


I used pepper and cream of wheat for stop leak once.


Chuck
Click to expand...

Unfortunatley, we relieved ourselves before we left. Can you imagine how that would smell after it turned to steam and we opened the MC.
 
with my dad when i was a kid. we were at the metal yard getting stuff for his business. went to leave and noticed the green puddle. dad took a piece of old wooden gutter that was n the truck, whittled it to a point and hammered it in. when the truck was scrapped, had to b 5 years later, that chunk of wood was still sticking out of the grill. everytime it would start to leak, just tap it in a bit further....
 
rp23g7 said:
Unfortunatley, we relieved ourselves before we left. Can you imagine how that would smell after it turned to steam and we opened the MC.
Click to expand...

Probably just like the smell you get when peeing on a campfire to put it out.


Chuck
 
Going to daytona beach had a rod bearing go. Two of my buddies in the car were weight lifters so we drained the oil in a cooler and threw the beer and ice in the trunk of the renault up front. then we all pushed it up on the side and removed the pan with vice grips. Cut a strip of belt leather and bolted it in the rod cap of the offending rod and used folded paper bag for a repair on the pan gasket and rolled it back on its wheels poured the oil back in filtered thru a tee shirt and fired it back up. 3 hours on the side of the road. thank god it ran cause we was out of beer. It had a little sprinkle trail of oil but we made it to spring break and put maybe 30 miles on it before the trip back home,70 miles. Went thru a case of cheap oil but we didnt have to walk. I think the car was a mid 60,s renault. wish they were still that simple.
 
Not a repair just a quick get ya going.
I was 16 on Ohau. Pinto filled with friends and the surf boards on top. Going down the road the temp gauge pegged. Got out checked the fluid which was none. Looking around we were surrounded by pineapple fields no buildings as far as the eye could see. We releived ourselves into the radiator. HORRIBLE SMELL Put the cap on and headed to the beach.

Same Pinto coming down a mountain on Ohau had a flat tire. No jack No spare tire on a rim. We had a tire just no rim for it. Couldnt call parents because they would be mad that I wasnt on the right side of the Island.
Drove on flat down the mountain to a gas station. Borrowed a jack, raised the car and lowered it onto the flat tire to break the bead. Got the bead broke and worked the spare tire onto the rim. Used the drum and lowered the car to get the tire over the rim. Filled it with air and went home. Still got grounded.
 
Pop was driving an old R-model day cab Mack when the universal going to the first screw broke out. He climbed under the truck got the driveshaft and what was left of the universal into the yoke and got out the heavy duty fiberous packaging tape. Used a whole roll on the yoke and driveshaft then drove the rest of the way to the terminal, about a 140 miles doing about 40-45mph.
 
daredevil said:
Going to daytona beach had a rod bearing go. Two of my buddies in the car were weight lifters so we drained the oil in a cooler and threw the beer and ice in the trunk of the renault up front. then we all pushed it up on the side and removed the pan with vice grips. Cut a strip of belt leather and bolted it in the rod cap of the offending rod and used folded paper bag for a repair on the pan gasket and rolled it back on its wheels poured the oil back in filtered thru a tee shirt and fired it back up. 3 hours on the side of the road. thank god it ran cause we was out of beer. It had a little sprinkle trail of oil but we made it to spring break and put maybe 30 miles on it before the trip back home,70 miles. Went thru a case of cheap oil but we didnt have to walk. I think the car was a mid 60,s renault. wish they were still that simple.
Click to expand...

Okay, it's offical. You get the "McGyver Award" Are you sure there wasn't suppose to be a wooden match and tampon somewhere in this story?
 
duct tape around rad hoses,pissing in tha rad when it was empty. Used seal all on an oil pan that got a hole in it and drove it for better than 50 miles to get home...
 
When I was 19-20 I had a 64 Plymouth Savoy /6 and out on the second date with a hottie. Since second date I took her to a fancy restaurant ( so she would know how much I cared and respected her ) and we got all dressed up. Took her on a sight seeing drive by the light of the moon to get to " The Parking Spot" which was a ways "out". The temp gage was pegged when we got there but since I had other things on my mind ( only those involving respect for the fairer sex ) I didn't worry about it ( silly me ).
After showing proper respect to my date and since it was chilly and wanting to show even more respect to the then love of my life I started the engine to get the heater running so she wouldn't be chilled while......
So after running awhile the temp gage pegged out again and steam started to appear while I was showing after respect respect to my date.
By this time I realized something might really be amiss and shut the engine down to take the proverbial " look under the hood". The fan belt had broken. We were a "ways" out.
Since I had shown her gentlemanly respect she did not object ( too much ) to removing her stockings ( kinda in the transition to pantyhose time ) in order for me to tie them together and fabricate a temp' fan belt.

I drove slow and we got to her house only slightly later than required and I replaced the fan belt the next day.
 
I was a kid when I had a 36 hp v-dub you know the ones with the little tiny back window. My bother and I had it sputter and die. Fuel pump had died. We had a lenth of gas hose and my brother walked the ditch and found a wiskey bottle. sifoned gas from tank to bottle and tied trunk lid to open position. Tied bottle to trunk handle up in air and sifoned gas to carb with gas hose. Got us home ran good to but cops could not see rear tag.
Another time same car broke wire to gas peddle. Just open carb half way stuff match book in it. Start and board shift through gears and when it gets going shut off ignition to slow down turn on to speed up.
 
Has a friend fix his windshield wipers somehow with a paper clip and a hair tie... don't remember what exactly was wrong exactly... but he made the mopar guys proud, lol.
 
I had the carburetor plug up completely. Needed to get the car home, so I strapped a gas can to the roof, ran a hose down under the back edge of the hood, used a large bore hypodermic needle (veterinary supply) in a vacuum hose. It ran to get it home, slobbering ritch at idle, ok at off idle, lean any over that. But it did make it home, without a functioning carb!
 
nuttyprof said:
I had the carburetor plug up completely. Needed to get the car home, so I strapped a gas can to the roof, ran a hose down under the back edge of the hood, used a large bore hypodermic needle (veterinary supply) in a vacuum hose. It ran to get it home, slobbering ritch at idle, ok at off idle, lean any over that. But it did make it home, without a functioning carb!
Click to expand...

that worked? I have heard people putting styrofoam cups fileld with gas jammed on the air cleaner stud and driving the car too
 
We had a 93 POS Ford Escort Wagon that was squeaking from the front end. The K frame had rusted in two. Four hose clamps and a 1/2 inch threaded rod later we were back on the road. Drove it for a year that way and then right to the salvage yard.
 
As a drummer I always carried a pair of sticks in the car with me. Easy to stay entertained in gridlock if I could keep a beat going.

Cruising home from work in my old '70 Nova when I stopped at a red light. The light changed, I hit the gas, drove a couple blocks and it started bucking like a bronco and running like crap. I pulled over and discovered the big plug on the vacuum port on the back of the carb was missing. I had tools ... but no extra vacuum plugs.

I grabbed one of my drumsticks, ballparked the length needed and snapped it off on the curb. I wedged the tip to the vac port and the fat end against the firewall and tapped it in place with my hand. It certainly wasn't pretty or an amazing feat of engineering greatness ........ but it got me home. :-D
 
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