I hate it when.....

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grampyjay

grampyjay

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Don't you hate it when you swing your legs out of bed in the morning and step in a pile of dog poop, and you go to beat the dog and then realize you don't have a dog?

I HATE THAT!!!!
 
slight misquote here, but you'd be like a blind man in a dark room looking for a black dog that isnt there
 
Or when you're driving to work in the morning and your turn signals quit working and you stick your arm out to signal for a left turn and slap a cop.

I HATE THAT!!!
 
grampyjay said:
Or when you're driving to work in the morning and your turn signals quit working and you stick your arm out to signal for a left turn and slap a cop.

I HATE THAT!!!
Click to expand...

long time ago (long enough for the statute of limitation to expire, i hope) i was on my way to school
it was early spring, there was no snow but everything was soggy
i was riding my dirtbike and got pulled over for speeding or not signaling or popping wheelies or who knows what
well, i pull over on the shoulder and the officer (on a honda transalp motorcycle) pulled in behind me

i got the whole spiel, warning this warning that, but he finally let me off with just a warning
so as the cop is walking back to his ride i get back on my bike, fire her up, kick her in first and let off the clutch...just a little too quick
remember the shoulder was a little soggy?
well i rooster tailed mud ALL over both the officer and his bike...which oddly enough, he thought constituted assault (didnt get of with a warning on that one)
 
Reminds me of what happened to my oldest Son not long ago.

His GF is on probation, so no drugs, alcohol or association with criminals.
Well, my Son was drinking the night before and there was bottles sitting around in the morning.

He gets awoken by loud knocking on their door really early in the morning and my Son has a hangover from the night before.
He hears the door and jumps out of bed stepping in a big puddle of cold doggie runs with both bare feet.
Now he can't figure out how to get to the door with this all over his feet, so he grabs a T shirt to stand on and shuffles on it toward the door while the knocking gets louder and louder.
It's his GF's probation officer and she wants to come in, and asks him why he seems so irritated.:D
 
TrailBeast said:
Reminds me of what happened to my oldest Son not long ago.

His GF is on probation, so no drugs, alcohol or association with criminals.
Well, my Son was drinking the night before and there was bottles sitting around in the morning.

He gets awoken by loud knocking on their door really early in the morning and my Son has a hangover from the night before.
He hears the door and jumps out of bed stepping in a big puddle of cold doggie runs with both bare feet.
Now he can't figure out how to get to the door with this all over his feet, so he grabs a T shirt to stand on and shuffles on it toward the door while the knocking gets louder and louder.
It's his GF's probation officer and she wants to come in, and asks him why he seems so irritated.:D
Click to expand...
That's a really crappy story.
 
I have a friend that was coming down the Alaskan highway. He and his wife had stopped to swim in a couple of hot springs along the way. So when they got on a long straight stretch he thought what better place to get out of hi wet bathing suit...so he opens the door and can see no cars coming and gets out of his truck and starts to strip. but when he got his wet suit down around his ankles his wife started to yell that a bear was coming. By the time he stumbled into the truck the bear was on the truck. He said he never had a chance to get the wet suit off because it was stuck around his ankles and he couldn't run. His truck is a manual shift and he struggled to get it moving also with his wet suit wrapped around his ankles. He made it with just a small amount of damage to his truck. But his ego was hurt when his wife said something about him being bear pissed the real bear off.
 
Or when you swing your legs over the side of the bed and step right on a cold but still juicy hair ball that your cat puked up about an hour before.


Yuck
 
Or when you're pulling on your boots at 230 am, and you find a nice juicy hair ball in the left one#
 
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