She's Killin Me Here ... Could Use Some Tips on Living With the Elderly

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Thanks guys.

The biggest hurdle and the hardest thing to admit is that I have a total lack of control over the situation and really have no say in the outcome. It's not my mother ... it's not my house ... it's not my shop ... it's just my problem to deal with.

I'm not a fan of ultimatums and am quietly feeling like a bit of a rebel. Being faced with "sucking it up and dealing with it" versus making other arrangements for myself after 10 years with this guy is kind of a kick in the head to be honest.

I know I'm a lot stronger than I realize and I'll get through this. Somehow.

Thanks again for listening and helping out -- it really is appreciated.
 
damnimcooltom said:
That's not even close to true.

I've known some elderly that have enjoyed being in a home, and I've known some that beg to leave, and/or lay in bed all day, asking to die.

Billy and Leanna are trying to help her, and are concerned about her health, mental state and happiness. A home may be in her future, but assuming everyone is the same, and suggesting the easy way out without research isn't helpful.

Decent nursing homes are very expensive, too.
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My grandmother told me that if she was ever at the point where she had to go to a nursing home (her words: "A warehouse for people who haven't realized they're dead yet."), she wanted me to shoot her.
 
CudaChick1968 said:
Thanks guys.

The biggest hurdle and the hardest thing to admit is that I have a total lack of control over the situation and really have no say in the outcome. It's not my mother ... it's not my house ... it's not my shop ... it's just my problem to deal with.

I'm not a fan of ultimatums and am quietly feeling like a bit of a rebel. Being faced with "sucking it up and dealing with it" versus making other arrangements for myself after 10 years with this guy is kind of a kick in the head to be honest.

I know I'm a lot stronger than I realize and I'll get through this. Somehow.

Thanks again for listening and helping out -- it really is appreciated.
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Speaking as someone who is a bit emotional...have YOU considered seeing a counselor? If nothing else, I worry about your marriage. You can't keep bottling things up, there WILL be an explosion, eventually. I tried...it did not turn out well and nearly ended up with me in prison.
 
I will keep you in my prayers. I am lucky that my mom lives in south Florida with my younger sister. Last year she kept telling my sister that she needed to call rescue or go to the hospital. She just turned 89 and is in better health than any of her kids. So doctor put her on Paxil and had nurse come by twice a day to check on her and take her blood preasure, always normal. One day she tells nurse she just wants to take a handful of pills and die. This backfired on her as the nurse called rescue and police and got her baker acted. A few days in the mental hospital stopped that crap as my older sister and I told her we were going to sign the papers so they would keep her in there. She decided to knock that crap off as she didn't enjoy her stay there. The bad thing is my older sister who lives about 35 miles away has started to lose her mind with depression. This has become my cross to bear as her husband is worthless. So we all have our cross to bear. I have made a plan with a diving buddy if I loose my mind to take me on a deep dive and switch me to pure oxygen and that should take care of it quick LOL. Hang tough Leanna
 
CudaChick1968 said:
Thanks guys.

The biggest hurdle and the hardest thing to admit is that I have a total lack of control over the situation and really have no say in the outcome. It's not my mother ... it's not my house ... it's not my shop ... it's just my problem to deal with.
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My $.02, this is simple, by the end of the month, either she goes or you do.
 
goldfish65 said:
My $.02, this is simple, by the end of the month, either she goes or you do.
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I wish it WAS that simple David.

Straight up ya'll, ever since this thread was resurrected yesterday I've been really depressed and actually had what I can only assume is my first ever panic attack. Followed up by another one last night around midnight thanks only to ...... uhhhhhhhhhhh nevermind. I'm not even going to mention it because I promised myself and the rest of the world that that asshole was never going to take up any more of my time or energy ever again.

I'm closing this thread ... but it isn't because of the replies or all the offers of help. They're all truly appreciated.
 
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