is it a good idea to fix your kids' cars for them?

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M

MOPARoldtimer

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Even though my father was a really nice guy, he was about the most un-mechanically-inclined person who ever existed. Therefore, I had to either learn to work on my own cars when I was a teenager, or ride my bicycle or walk instead. So I learned to work on cars.

That was one of the best things I ever learned because when I was younger I didn't have enough money to pay a mechanic to work on my cars. However, by working on them myself I was able to afford a pretty decent car and to keep it in good running condition. Moreover, it made it possible for me to engage in the resto/repair hobby that I really enjoy as a retired person.

I doubt that I would have learned to work on cars if my father had been a really good mechanic and had been willing to fix my cars for me. Plus, had my father been willing to fix them for me, I probably would have avoided working on my cars because I would have felt too insecure and like too much of a mechanical dummy compared to him.

So I ask: are we really doing our kids any favors by fixing their cars for them, or are we actually hurting them in the long run because they won't be able to fix their own cars when we're no longer around?

I look forward to hearing your opinions on this issue.
 
Depends on the repair and the mechanic learning. My daughter is a tiny thing @ 5'4" 90lbs soaking wet (while her 11 year old brother is 5'6" 125.)
She'll do a lot by herself, but sometimes Dad just gotta get in there and do some of the tuff bull work she can't do. Straightening out the front end after the fender bender was my job.
 
I prefer to fix things WITH my son, who right now is only 9! He loves to be out in the garage with me, so I like him to help change the oil, clean and disassemble parts and the like. We've had the mini bike up in the air for some maintenance too, which to me is a great way to get him going on single cylinder stuff, the foundation of all things mechanical IMO!!

He even thinks cardboard makes a suitable bed!!.... that's my boy!!
 
I say work WITH them and of course do thing that are above their ability but have them observe and help as much as they can.All three of my Sons work on their own stuff.Even my three Step-Daughters had me teach them how to change their own oil and do minor tuneups.They are all adults now and are now passing their knowledge down.
 
Depends on the kid and the job...

Me, I'll help my 18 year old boy out with his jeep. We will both repair it and hopefully he will be learning as we go to do things the right was.

Everyone is different though. Some kids just naturally have no mechanical ability. Can teach them to check the oil, tire psi and maybe a few other little things but anything else they just never get.


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My former stepson had no interest or desire to know about any car things at all. I had a few friends that "wanted" help, but it turned out that they just wanted someone else to do their repair or restoration. My rule always has been that I'll help you and teach you to do it but that's it. If it was changing brake shoes, I would teach on one wheel and offer guidance on the other. I usually found that the "student" wasn't even paying attention to the demo and just expected that I would do the whole job while they pretended to listen.:banghead:

I gave up doing this because of this crap. Most "car people" I run into really don't know or care to know anything about car repairs or restorations. They just drive them after other people do all the work. :wack:

Anyone else have similar experiences???
 
I learned from my Dad who was a farmer and by necessity did most of his own mechanic and carpenter work. He was also a good welder and fabricator and built and modified farm equipment. So I worked along side him and learned a lot. That spurred me to get my Mechanical Engineering degree and work in mining equipment erection and maintenance. My daughter is my only child and she didn't like working on cars but she is pretty handy on house repairs and furniture refinishing. I'm trying to teach my grandkids about cars now. My granddaughter when she was 2 grabbed a hammer and was going to help Papa on the Duster. Luckily I caught her before she helped. Now that she's 7 she does help some.
 
abodyjoe said:
depends on the kid and the job...

Everyone is different though. Some kids just naturally have no mechanical ability. Can teach them to check the oil, tire psi and maybe a few other little things but anything else they just never get.


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Bingo!
 
Screw um. Let um suffer.
 
If they help I am willing to help them but if they just stand around texting then they can have someone else do it. They can plan on getting their hands dirty, twisting wrenches, being a go for, crawling under the car and doing what ever it takes.

Our oldest daughter is a great success on her ability to work on cars while our youngest daughter hates to get her hands dirty and complains the whole time. Guess who's car sits while it is broken while she bums rides or walks?

All I can say if they don't want to learn anything about cars they better get a good education so they can get a job to where they can afford to pay to have it done because dad won't always be around to do it for them.
 
All I have is a girl and she works on premi babies not on cars. She wants me to get through with mine so I can get her a convertible a red one she is 24.
 
I'll throw in my two cents. My father wasn't very mechanically inclined or just chose not to be so growing up so no one really taught me how to be hands on. Well, getting into college and working on the baja club and buying my own project has been more of a difficulty for me. I have to make assumptions and learn on the job and tend to do the stupidest things, unable to complete even the smallest job 50% of the time. Doing the work on my own I lack all confidence and prolong even the easiest tasks. I wish I had someone to show me how things worked when I was younger because I feel it's harder to learn things on your own the older you get. I honestly don't know how some people can just look at something for the first time, take it apart, learn everything about it, and then put it all back together. I guess I was never born with the knack.

It's taken me almost a year, on and off, for me to try to fix my brake situation and I'm still not done. I bet if anyone else on this board were given the opportunity to do the work that I've done and plan to do, it would take them a couple weeks tops. I keep looking at the job and seeing how easy it can be, but at the same time I just don't have the motivation to work on it due to the fear of not doing it before and screwing up.
 
MuuMuu101 said:
I'll throw in my two cents. My father wasn't very mechanically inclined or just chose not to be so growing up so no one really taught me how to be hands on. Well, getting into college and working on the baja club and buying my own project has been more of a difficulty for me. I have to make assumptions and learn on the job and tend to do the stupidest things, unable to complete even the smallest job 50% of the time. Doing the work on my own I lack all confidence and prolong even the easiest tasks. I wish I had someone to show me how things worked when I was younger because I feel it's harder to learn things on your own the older you get. I honestly don't know how some people can just look at something for the first time, take it apart, learn everything about it, and then put it all back together. I guess I was never born with the knack.

It's taken me almost a year, on and off, for me to try to fix my brake situation and I'm still not done. I bet if anyone else on this board were given the opportunity to do the work that I've done and plan to do, it would take them a couple weeks tops. I keep looking at the job and seeing how easy it can be, but at the same time I just don't have the motivation to work on it due to the fear of not doing it before and screwing up.
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I admire you for getting involved without the aid of someone teaching you and you will be able to accomplish it if you stay with it.

My parents divorced when I was 5 so my abilities are self taught. I made mistakes and quickly learned to get the correct manuals for what I was working on. The manuals made me a lot better able to fix what needed fixed without causing more problems. With the power of the internet the supply of knowledge you have access to is 100 times of what I had when I grew up.

There isn't a single day that my knowledge base isn't extended by reading the help threads on this site. I read threads that I will never be doing because I still learn and then I can point others to that thread if the question comes up later.
 
You've got to keep working on cars in order to maintain your skills. When I was young I learned to do almost all my own work. Then when I got a good job I paid a mechanic to do my repairs for a long time. By the time I decided to do my own work again, I had forgotten a lot of what I had learned.
 
MuuMuu101 said:
I'll throw in my two cents. My father wasn't very mechanically inclined or just chose not to be so growing up so no one really taught me how to be hands on.
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same here.. my father tried but just couldn't do anything mechanical. just one of those guys with good intentions that just could never pick it up..

i did luck out that a neighbor knew quite a bit. i would run back and forth when i had a question.

i remember the first clutch i ever did. charlie told me where to start. when i got the trans and drive shaft out o ran back over to his place and asked what next. step by step i did the same thing. in the end i had the clutch in and it actually worked properly..lol

I have to make assumptions and learn on the job and tend to do the stupidest things, unable to complete even the smallest job 50% of the time.
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thats how most of us started. learn by trial and error...

I honestly don't know how some people can just look at something for the first time, take it apart, learn everything about it, and then put it all back together. I guess I was never born with the knack.
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thats just a gift they were born with...


It's taken me almost a year, on and off, for me to try to fix my brake situation and I'm still not done. I bet if anyone else on this board were given the opportunity to do the work that I've done and plan to do, it would take them a couple weeks tops. I keep looking at the job and seeing how easy it can be, but at the same time I just don't have the motivation to work on it due to the fear of not doing it before and screwing up.
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you need a friend that can help you through that stuff.
 
On my daughters car I fixed everything and kept it perfect. She paid for the parts and I would run it though the shop and I paid my Guys. My sons (who work for me now) were given advice, keys to the shop all the info they needed but it was up to them to fix it. I would teach how to do things and then they were expected to do it. My 23 year old is on of the best techs in the area and he can think while working on stuff. It is the teach a man to fish thing.
 
My father is a farmer and could basically call him a millwright without papers. He has put to shame numerous trade millwrights and numerous engineers with what he manages to accomplish with the farm machinery. He has custom built numerous things only to see his inventions turn up elsewhere with a big name on it. I have yet to see my father stumped on a project. If people in the community have a problem they come seek out my father. Yes even industry professionals. He can make professional welders look like crap. Maybe he is too high on a pedestal for me?

I somewhat learned from him with some things as time went by. However by the time i was 11 I had an off the farm job in a restaurant.

When i finally realized what I should be doing in life i was 23 and decided to do something mechanical so i became a trade machinist. Now my father and i combine our knowledge and fix things that people say cannot be done. It can be interesting when either one of us get an idea of what to do and how to make something better. The brainstorms sometimes become nightmares .... but there is always something to work on in our shop.
 
One word,....NOPE,...Show em how, and tell what to watch out for, but don't get suckered into fixin em while they're out and about. This is how all these "entitled" kids got that way inna first place.
 
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